1
00:00:03,133 --> 00:00:05,865
♪ IT SEEMS TODAY
THAT ALL YOU SEE ♪
2
00:00:05,934 --> 00:00:09,231
♪ IS VIOLENCE IN MOVIES
AND SEX ON TV ♪
3
00:00:09,300 --> 00:00:12,799
♪ BUT WHERE ARE THOSE
GOOD OLD-FASHIONED VALUES ♪
4
00:00:12,868 --> 00:00:15,865
♪ ON WHICH WE USED TO RELY? ♪
5
00:00:15,934 --> 00:00:19,232
♪ LUCKY THERE'S A FAMILY GUY ♪
6
00:00:19,300 --> 00:00:22,498
♪ LUCKY THERE'S A MAN
WHO POSITIVELY CAN DO ♪
7
00:00:22,567 --> 00:00:24,232
♪ ALL THE THINGS
THAT MAKE US ♪
8
00:00:24,300 --> 00:00:25,932
♪ LAUGH AND CRY ♪
9
00:00:26,001 --> 00:00:29,866
(all)
♪ HE'S A FAMILY GUY ♪
10
00:00:35,134 --> 00:00:38,432
(announcer)
AND NOW BACK TO OLD PEOPLE
AGREE WITH ARNOLD PALMER.
11
00:00:38,501 --> 00:00:41,431
TOMATO SOUP, GRILLED CHEESE,
AND A WEAK CUP OF TEA
12
00:00:41,501 --> 00:00:44,132
IS THE BEST LUNCH IN MY BOOK.
13
00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:46,631
HE'S RIGHT.
I ENJOY THINGS I REMEMBER.
14
00:00:46,700 --> 00:00:48,298
PETER, I'M OFF
TO MY BOOK CLUB.
15
00:00:48,367 --> 00:00:50,499
DON'T FORGET YOU HAVE TO GO
TO THE P.T.A. MEETING.
16
00:00:50,567 --> 00:00:51,732
ME?
GO TO A P.T.A. MEETING?
17
00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:52,932
WHAT, ARE YOU HIGH?
18
00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:54,698
NOT ANYMORE.
I CRASHED HOURS AGO.
19
00:00:54,767 --> 00:00:57,465
BY THE WAY,
WE'RE OUT OF CHIPS, COOKIES,
AND FUNNY BONES.
20
00:00:57,533 --> 00:00:58,698
NOW, I'M GOING
TO MY BOOK CLUB
21
00:00:58,767 --> 00:01:00,665
AND YOU ARE GOING
TO THE MEETING.
22
00:01:00,734 --> 00:01:03,331
HEY, BRIAN,
H-H-HOW ABOUT YOU GO TO
THAT MEETING FOR ME, HUH?
23
00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:04,932
YEAH.
UH, I DON'T THINK SO.
24
00:01:05,001 --> 00:01:06,665
OH, COME ON, BUDDY.
YOU OWE ME, HUH?
25
00:01:06,734 --> 00:01:09,932
Y-YOU REMEMBER
WHAT I DID FOR YOU LAST WEEK?
26
00:01:10,001 --> 00:01:13,498
♪ SIGHING SOFTLY
TO THE RIVER ♪
27
00:01:13,567 --> 00:01:16,498
♪ COMES THE LOVING BREEZE ♪
28
00:01:16,567 --> 00:01:19,898
♪ SETTING NATURE ALL AQUIVER ♪
29
00:01:19,968 --> 00:01:22,299
♪ RUSTLING THROUGH THE TREES ♪
30
00:01:22,367 --> 00:01:24,999
♪ THROUGH THE TREES! ♪
31
00:01:25,068 --> 00:01:26,066
[sighs]
32
00:01:26,135 --> 00:01:27,265
ALL RIGHT. I'LL GO.
33
00:01:36,968 --> 00:01:39,498
QUAGMIRE, WHAT--WHAT
ARE YOU DOING HERE?
YOU DON'T HAVE KIDS.
34
00:01:39,567 --> 00:01:40,665
DON'T BE SO SURE, BRIAN.
35
00:01:40,734 --> 00:01:42,598
I'VE SLEPT WITH CHICKS
ALL OVER THE WORLD.
36
00:01:42,667 --> 00:01:44,831
WHO KNOWS, I COULD
HAVE KIDS IN THEIR 20s.
37
00:01:44,901 --> 00:01:46,732
[crickets chirping]
38
00:01:48,235 --> 00:01:50,365
[speaking Spanish]
39
00:02:02,601 --> 00:02:03,632
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
40
00:02:03,701 --> 00:02:05,632
I GOT ROPED
INTO THIS BY PETER.
41
00:02:12,067 --> 00:02:14,565
WOW, THAT'S A,
THAT-- THAT'S A LOVELY COLOR.
42
00:02:14,634 --> 00:02:16,032
UH, Y-Y-YOUR DRESS IS...
43
00:02:16,101 --> 00:02:17,366
THE COLOR
OF YOUR DRESS IS...
44
00:02:17,434 --> 00:02:18,966
I LIKE--
YOU'RE--YOU'RE VERY PRETTY.
45
00:02:19,034 --> 00:02:20,198
OH, THANK YOU.
46
00:02:20,266 --> 00:02:22,231
I'M THE 11TH GRADE
HISTORY TEACHER, MISS PARKS.
47
00:02:22,300 --> 00:02:23,565
OH! LIKE ROSA PARKS.
48
00:02:23,634 --> 00:02:26,132
OR--OR, YOU KNOW,
OR SOMEONE WHITE NAMED PARKS.
49
00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:27,232
[chuckles]
50
00:02:27,301 --> 00:02:29,599
NOTHING CUTER THAN
A NERVOUS WHITE DOG.
51
00:02:33,034 --> 00:02:35,065
WELL, UH,
I'M--I'M BRIAN AND, UH,
52
00:02:35,134 --> 00:02:36,932
GOSH, IF I'M NOT BEING
TOO FORWARD,
53
00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:38,865
IT'S LOVELY TO
MEET YOU, MISS PARKS.
54
00:02:38,934 --> 00:02:40,899
OH, PLEASE.
CALL ME SHAUNA.
55
00:02:40,967 --> 00:02:44,332
♪ SHAUNA! SHAUNA! ♪
56
00:02:47,967 --> 00:02:50,398
SO, BRIAN,
YOU READY TO GO PLAY
SOME DARTS AT THE CLAM?
57
00:02:50,467 --> 00:02:52,299
AH, SORRY, PETER.
I CAN'T MAKE IT TONIGHT.
58
00:02:52,367 --> 00:02:53,398
I HAVE A DATE.
59
00:02:53,467 --> 00:02:54,665
DAD!
60
00:02:54,734 --> 00:02:56,231
BUT YOU WERE SUPPOSED
TO DRIVE TONIGHT.
61
00:02:56,300 --> 00:02:57,598
W-WHAT AM I
SUPPOSED TO DO?
62
00:02:57,667 --> 00:02:59,966
IF I DRIVE, I'LL HAVE TO HAVE
A BUNCH OF DRINKS FIRST,
63
00:03:00,034 --> 00:03:01,398
BECAUSE I AM
VERY SELF-CONSCIOUS
64
00:03:01,467 --> 00:03:02,499
ABOUT MY DRIVING.
65
00:03:02,634 --> 00:03:04,565
OH, YOU'VE GOT A DATE!
WHAT'S HIS NAME?
66
00:03:04,634 --> 00:03:06,832
HA, DO YOU-- DO YOU SEE THAT?
DO YOU SEE WHAT I DID?
67
00:03:06,901 --> 00:03:09,265
I MADE IT SEEM AS THOUGH
YOU WERE A HOMOSEXUAL.
68
00:03:09,334 --> 00:03:10,631
THAT'S FUNNY TO ME.
69
00:03:10,700 --> 00:03:12,198
HOW EXCITING, BRIAN.
70
00:03:12,266 --> 00:03:13,698
SO WHO'S THE LUCKY LADY?
71
00:03:13,767 --> 00:03:15,731
WELL, UH, ACTUALLY,
HER NAME IS SHAUNA PARKS.
72
00:03:15,800 --> 00:03:16,799
MEG'S TEACHER?
73
00:03:16,867 --> 00:03:17,932
[screams]
74
00:03:18,001 --> 00:03:19,932
YEAH, WE REALLY HIT IT OFF.
SHE'S GREAT.
75
00:03:20,001 --> 00:03:21,731
OH, BRIAN ON A DATE, HMM?
76
00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:24,199
THAT'LL BE MORE PATHETIC
THAN THAT GAME OF MARCO POLO
77
00:03:24,268 --> 00:03:25,632
I PLAYED WITH HELEN KELLER.
78
00:03:25,700 --> 00:03:26,866
MARCO.
79
00:03:27,733 --> 00:03:28,899
MARCO.
80
00:03:29,900 --> 00:03:31,066
MARCO.
81
00:03:32,067 --> 00:03:33,298
MARCO.
82
00:03:34,367 --> 00:03:35,365
MARCO.
83
00:03:36,600 --> 00:03:37,598
MARCO.
84
00:03:38,901 --> 00:03:39,898
MARCO.
85
00:03:40,733 --> 00:03:41,731
MARCO.
86
00:03:42,868 --> 00:03:43,865
MARCO.
87
00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:50,264
I DON'T KNOW.
I MEAN, I--I THINK
I WANT TO HAVE KIDS SOMEDAY.
88
00:03:50,333 --> 00:03:52,765
OH, I LOVE KIDS.
OH, I JUST LOVE 'EM.
89
00:03:52,834 --> 00:03:54,999
I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF
THOSE LITTLE BUGGERS,
90
00:03:55,067 --> 00:03:56,364
LET ME TELL YOU.
91
00:03:56,433 --> 00:03:58,364
YOU KNOW, IT'S--IT'S LIKE
I TELL THE OTHER VOLUNTEERS
92
00:03:58,433 --> 00:03:59,932
DOWN AT
THE ADOPTION CENTER:
93
00:04:00,001 --> 00:04:01,699
OH, MY GOD, YOU KNOW,
94
00:04:01,767 --> 00:04:04,298
IF I COULD JUST TAKE
ALL THE ORPHANS IN THE WORLD
95
00:04:04,367 --> 00:04:06,932
AND JUST, YOU KNOW,
BUY A FARM SOMEWHERE
96
00:04:07,001 --> 00:04:09,232
AND--AND LET THEM ALL
RUN FREE, YOU KNOW.
97
00:04:09,301 --> 00:04:11,732
JUST LET THEM DO
LITTLE MACARONI-ART PICTURES
98
00:04:11,801 --> 00:04:13,365
OF THEIR DEAD PARENTS.
99
00:04:13,433 --> 00:04:15,865
SO, UH,
W-WHAT'S IT-- WHAT'S IT LIKE
TO WORK AT A HIGH SCHOOL?
100
00:04:15,934 --> 00:04:17,498
OH, BRIAN, I JUST LOVE IT.
101
00:04:17,567 --> 00:04:19,133
WORKING AT JAMES WOODS HIGH
IS GREAT.
102
00:04:19,200 --> 00:04:20,398
YOU KNOW,
I'VE ALWAYS WONDERED
103
00:04:20,466 --> 00:04:22,431
WHY THEY NAMED IT AFTER
JAMES WOODS, YOU KNOW?
104
00:04:22,500 --> 00:04:24,865
I MEAN, THERE'S--THERE'S GOT
TO BE SOMEBODY MORE DESERVING.
105
00:04:24,934 --> 00:04:26,865
LIKE, JUST, YOU KNOW,
OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD
106
00:04:26,934 --> 00:04:28,599
UH, I DON'T KNOW,
SIDNEY POITIER,
107
00:04:28,667 --> 00:04:31,499
REGGIE JACKSON,
MARTIN LUTHER KING.
108
00:04:31,567 --> 00:04:34,532
UH, YOU KNOW, THOSE ARE JUST
3 NAMES THAT COME TO MIND.
109
00:04:34,600 --> 00:04:36,132
BRIAN, THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
110
00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:38,665
WE SHOULD GET THEM TO RENAME
THE SCHOOL AFTER DR. KING.
111
00:04:38,733 --> 00:04:41,232
YOU LIKE DR. KING?
BECAUSE I LOVE DR. KING.
112
00:04:41,300 --> 00:04:43,065
I LOVE-- M.L.K!
113
00:04:43,134 --> 00:04:45,665
MAN, HE'S, HE'S MY GUY.
HE'S--HE'S...
114
00:04:45,734 --> 00:04:48,131
I MEAN, I--I LOVE
ALL BLACK PEOPLE, YOU KNOW.
115
00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:51,132
I MEAN, IF I COULD TAKE ALL
THE BLACK PEOPLE IN THE WORLD
116
00:04:51,201 --> 00:04:54,765
AND JUST, YOU KNOW,
JUST BUY A FARM SOMEWHERE
AND LET THEM ALL--
117
00:04:54,834 --> 00:04:56,264
UH, WHOA,
YOU KNOW WHAT,
118
00:04:56,333 --> 00:04:58,265
THAT, UH, ACTUALLY,
THAT DIDN'T REALLY
COME OUT RIGHT.
119
00:04:58,334 --> 00:05:00,066
BRIAN, RELAX.
I'M HAVING A GREAT TIME.
120
00:05:00,135 --> 00:05:01,832
YOU DON'T HAVE
TO TRY SO HARD.
121
00:05:01,900 --> 00:05:03,565
GREAT. GREAT.
'CAUSE, YOU KNOW,
122
00:05:03,634 --> 00:05:06,065
I'M--I'M NOT OK WITH SLAVERY.
JUST SO WE'RE CLEAR.
123
00:05:06,134 --> 00:05:07,898
I MEAN, IF--IF I--I WAS
OFFERED A SLAVE,
124
00:05:07,967 --> 00:05:09,298
I- I'D SAY NO.
125
00:05:11,834 --> 00:05:13,364
OH, BY THE WAY, BONNIE,
126
00:05:13,433 --> 00:05:15,665
WE JUST FINISHED READING
THE DA VINCI CODE
AT MY BOOK CLUB.
127
00:05:15,734 --> 00:05:17,631
YOU WERE RIGHT.
IT'S TERRIFIC.
128
00:05:17,701 --> 00:05:18,965
OH, LET ME GUESS.
129
00:05:19,034 --> 00:05:22,298
SOME FLOWERY, 300-PAGE,
MENOPAUSAL MASTURBATORY AID.
130
00:05:22,366 --> 00:05:23,699
AH, I LOVED IT.
131
00:05:23,767 --> 00:05:26,131
OH, AND THE CHAPTERS ARE
ONLY ABOUT 2 PAGES LONG.
132
00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:28,066
SO YOU FEEL REALLY SMART
WHEN YOU READ IT.
133
00:05:28,133 --> 00:05:29,732
TAKE IT OUTSIDE, LOIS.
134
00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:32,999
GOOD NIGHT, SWEETIE.
135
00:05:34,767 --> 00:05:37,932
OH, YES. JUST AS I THOUGHT:
FRANCE, ART,
136
00:05:38,434 --> 00:05:39,564
MURDER?
137
00:05:39,633 --> 00:05:41,233
WELL, THIS IS
A BIGGER SURPRISE
138
00:05:41,300 --> 00:05:43,465
THAN THAT TIME
PETER VANISHED INTO THIN AIR.
139
00:05:43,534 --> 00:05:45,165
HEY, STEWIE. PEEKABOO!
140
00:05:45,234 --> 00:05:46,799
YES, I SEE YOU, FAT MAN.
141
00:05:46,867 --> 00:05:48,332
WHERE'S DADDY?
142
00:05:48,401 --> 00:05:50,632
WHERE DID YOU GO?
OH, THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE.
143
00:05:50,700 --> 00:05:53,132
I--I CAN HEAR YOU,
BUT I CAN'T SEE--
144
00:05:53,201 --> 00:05:55,832
WELL,
HE MUST REALLY BE GONE!
145
00:05:55,900 --> 00:05:57,099
PEEKABOO!
AH!
146
00:05:57,167 --> 00:05:58,431
HOW THE HELL
DID YOU DO THAT?
147
00:05:58,500 --> 00:05:59,898
LOOK, I THOUGHT
YOU'D DISAPPEARED,
148
00:05:59,967 --> 00:06:01,498
OTHERWISE I WOULDN'T HAVE
PICKED MY...
149
00:06:01,567 --> 00:06:04,699
GREAT, LEAVE WHEN
I'M RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE
OF A SENTENCE.
150
00:06:06,466 --> 00:06:07,498
HEY, THERE YOU ARE, BRIAN.
151
00:06:07,567 --> 00:06:08,965
WE'RE ALL SET
FOR TONIGHT, RIGHT?
152
00:06:09,034 --> 00:06:10,431
OH, UH,
TONIGHT'S NO GOOD, PETER.
153
00:06:10,501 --> 00:06:11,865
I HAVE ANOTHER DATE
WITH SHAUNA.
154
00:06:11,934 --> 00:06:13,331
OH, COME ON. AGAIN?
155
00:06:13,400 --> 00:06:14,431
WELL, FINE, BRIAN.
156
00:06:14,501 --> 00:06:16,565
IF THAT GIRL IS MORE IMPORTANT
TO YOU THAN ME,
157
00:06:16,634 --> 00:06:18,665
THEN I GUESS I'LL HAVE TO
FIND A NEW BEST PAL.
158
00:06:20,301 --> 00:06:21,331
BOY, BARNEY,
159
00:06:21,400 --> 00:06:22,899
IT'S SURE BEEN GREAT
HANGING OUT WITH YOU.
160
00:06:22,967 --> 00:06:23,965
[Barney laughs]
161
00:06:24,034 --> 00:06:25,599
(Barney)
I'VE ENJOYED IT, TOO, PETER.
162
00:06:25,667 --> 00:06:27,032
HEY, YOU ALMOST
DONE IN THE JOHN?
163
00:06:27,100 --> 00:06:28,265
'CAUSE WE'RE LATE FOR DARTS.
164
00:06:28,333 --> 00:06:29,699
ALL DONE, PETER.
165
00:06:30,701 --> 00:06:33,232
YOU THINK YOU HAVE A CRAP JOB.
166
00:06:40,401 --> 00:06:42,299
I DON'T NEED BRIAN
TO WATCH T.V. WITH.
167
00:06:42,368 --> 00:06:43,932
I GOT YOU, MEG.
168
00:06:44,001 --> 00:06:45,832
HEY, HEY, WHAT'S THAT?
WHAT'S THAT?
169
00:06:45,901 --> 00:06:46,932
IS THAT A DOG?
170
00:06:47,001 --> 00:06:48,766
IS THAT ANOTHER DOG
ON THE T.V., HUH?
171
00:06:48,834 --> 00:06:51,632
YOU SEE THAT?
GO GET IT. GO GET IT.
172
00:06:51,701 --> 00:06:53,665
WHAT'S THAT?
WHO'S THAT? WHO'S THAT?
173
00:06:53,734 --> 00:06:54,865
OH! WHO'S THAT?
174
00:06:54,934 --> 00:06:56,732
WHO'S THERE? IS THERE
SOMEBODY AT THE DOOR?
175
00:06:56,801 --> 00:06:58,965
SOMEBODY AT THE DOOR? HUH?
SOMEBODY AT THE DOOR? HUH?
176
00:06:59,034 --> 00:07:01,599
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO
ABOUT IT? WHAT ARE YOU
GONNA DO ABOUT IT?
177
00:07:01,667 --> 00:07:04,065
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO
ABOUT IT? WHAT ARE YOU...
178
00:07:04,133 --> 00:07:06,132
I'M NOT A DOG,
YOU FAT BASTARD!
179
00:07:09,734 --> 00:07:11,732
WOW, STEWIE,
YOU'RE UP EARLY.
180
00:07:11,801 --> 00:07:14,132
I'M UP STILL. I'VE BEEN
READING ALL NIGHT.
181
00:07:14,201 --> 00:07:16,398
H-HANG ON, LOIS. HANG ON.
HANG ON. HANG ON.
182
00:07:16,467 --> 00:07:20,098
WELL, I LOVED THIS BOOK.
183
00:07:20,167 --> 00:07:23,132
NOTHING LIKE A GOOD STORY
TO RECHARGE YOUR BATTERIES.
184
00:07:23,967 --> 00:07:25,165
[snoring]
185
00:07:25,234 --> 00:07:27,498
HEY, EVERYBODY,
CHECK THIS OUT.
186
00:07:27,567 --> 00:07:30,698
OH, THIS IS WONDERFUL.
LOOK AT THIS, PETER.
187
00:07:30,767 --> 00:07:33,398
"200 DIE IN
TRAIN DERAILMENT."
188
00:07:33,467 --> 00:07:36,898
OH, GOD, LOIS.
THAT IS JUST MORBIDLY OBESE.
189
00:07:36,967 --> 00:07:38,531
NO, NO, PETER.
RIGHT HERE.
190
00:07:38,601 --> 00:07:40,765
I MENTIONED TO SHAUNA
THAT THEY OUGHT TO CHANGE
191
00:07:40,834 --> 00:07:43,165
THE NAME OF JAMES WOODS HIGH
TO MARTIN LUTHER KING JR.
192
00:07:43,234 --> 00:07:44,599
AND, UH,
SHE REALLY RAN WITH IT.
193
00:07:44,667 --> 00:07:46,498
THE SCHOOL BOARD IS
VOTING ON IT TOMORROW.
194
00:07:46,567 --> 00:07:48,065
CONGRATULATIONS, BRIAN.
195
00:07:48,133 --> 00:07:49,599
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
196
00:07:49,667 --> 00:07:51,299
YOU--YOU AND YOUR GIRLFRIEND
ARE TAKING
197
00:07:51,368 --> 00:07:53,165
THE NAME JAMES WOODS
OFF THE HIGH SCHOOL?
198
00:07:53,234 --> 00:07:54,632
WELL, YES.
FOR MARTIN LUTHER KING.
199
00:07:54,701 --> 00:07:56,098
THAT'S CRAZY.
200
00:07:56,167 --> 00:07:58,331
YOU'RE GONNA NAME THE SCHOOL
AFTER THE STAR OF SPACE 1999?
201
00:07:58,400 --> 00:07:59,665
NO, THAT'S MARTIN LANDAU.
202
00:07:59,734 --> 00:08:01,032
OH. THE GUY
WHO PLAYED SHENENEH?
203
00:08:01,101 --> 00:08:02,132
THAT'S MARTIN LAWRENCE.
204
00:08:02,201 --> 00:08:03,865
THE DRUNK CROONER?
THAT'S DEAN MARTIN.
205
00:08:03,933 --> 00:08:06,265
THE DRINK THAT'S BEST
SERVED ON THE ROCKS?
MARTINI & ROSSI.
206
00:08:06,333 --> 00:08:07,931
THE GUY ON THE WEST WING?
MARTIN SHEEN.
207
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:09,498
THE GUY FROM PLATOON?
CHARLIE SHEEN.
208
00:08:09,567 --> 00:08:11,032
NO, NO, THE OTHER GUY
FROM PLATOON.
209
00:08:11,101 --> 00:08:12,331
UH, UH, IT'S...
COME ON.
210
00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:13,832
UH, UH, W-W-WILLEM DAFOE.
211
00:08:13,901 --> 00:08:15,332
NO, IT'S TOM BERENGER.
212
00:08:15,401 --> 00:08:17,165
WE WERE LOOKING
FOR TOM BERENGER.
213
00:08:17,234 --> 00:08:19,866
WELL, THANKS FOR PLAYING.
I'M SORRY IT DIDN'T
WORK OUT FOR YOU.
214
00:08:19,934 --> 00:08:21,365
OH, THAT'S OK.
I HAD A LOT OF FUN.
215
00:08:21,433 --> 00:08:22,765
I'M-- I'M A BIG FAN
OF THE SHOW.
216
00:08:22,834 --> 00:08:24,298
WAIT A MINUTE!
217
00:08:24,366 --> 00:08:26,698
PETER, MARTIN LUTHER KING
WAS AN INSPIRATION
218
00:08:26,767 --> 00:08:28,365
TO AN ENTIRE GENERATION.
219
00:08:28,434 --> 00:08:30,732
HE WAS A DRIVING FORCE BEHIND
THE CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT.
220
00:08:30,801 --> 00:08:32,032
LOIS, WE'RE TALKING ABOUT
221
00:08:32,100 --> 00:08:33,665
RHODE ISLAND'S
OWN JAMES WOODS HERE.
222
00:08:33,734 --> 00:08:35,799
HE'S A HERO IN THESE PARTS,
HUH? USE YOUR HEAD.
223
00:08:35,868 --> 00:08:37,364
PETER, YOU'RE ACTING
LIKE AN IDIOT.
224
00:08:37,433 --> 00:08:39,665
OH, YEAH? I DON'T LIKE
THE WAY YOU'VE BEEN
ACTING LATELY.
225
00:08:39,733 --> 00:08:41,431
AND I THINK IT HAS A LOT
TO DO WITH THAT WOMAN
226
00:08:41,500 --> 00:08:42,832
YOU'VE BEEN SPENDING
SO MUCH TIME WITH.
227
00:08:42,901 --> 00:08:45,098
WHY DON'T YOU JUST MIND
YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS, PETER?
228
00:08:45,167 --> 00:08:47,332
WILL YOU GUYS
STOP FIGHTING, PLEASE?
229
00:08:48,067 --> 00:08:49,398
WHAT'S WRONG WITH MEG?
230
00:08:49,467 --> 00:08:50,464
OH, NOTHING.
231
00:08:50,533 --> 00:08:51,965
IT'S JUST HER
TIME OF THE MONTH.
232
00:08:52,034 --> 00:08:53,698
NOT AGAIN.
233
00:09:04,101 --> 00:09:05,199
WELL, MR. GRIFFIN,
234
00:09:05,267 --> 00:09:07,132
YOUR ARGUMENTS FOR
THE SCHOOL'S NAME CHANGE
235
00:09:07,201 --> 00:09:08,432
ARE QUITE COMPELLING.
236
00:09:08,500 --> 00:09:10,232
BRIAN, I THINK YOU DID IT.
237
00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:11,565
OH, AMEN.
238
00:09:11,634 --> 00:09:13,899
BY THE WAY, I JUST WANT TO
REMIND EVERYBODY
239
00:09:13,967 --> 00:09:16,865
TO PUT THEIR E-MAIL ADDRESS
ON THE LIST IN THE BACK THERE
240
00:09:16,934 --> 00:09:19,565
SO WE CAN SEND YOU
OUR QUARTERLY NEWSLETTER.
241
00:09:19,634 --> 00:09:22,464
IT'S CHOCK-FULL OF GOINGS-ON
AROUND THE SCHOOL.
242
00:09:22,533 --> 00:09:24,199
IT'S GOT A WORD JUMBLE.
243
00:09:24,267 --> 00:09:25,598
A LITTLE HINT:
244
00:09:25,667 --> 00:09:28,499
ALL THE ANSWERS HAVE TO DO
WITH SOMETHING HERE
AT THE SCHOOL.
245
00:09:28,567 --> 00:09:30,832
YES, I'M SURE WE'RE ALL
LOOKING FORWARD TO THAT.
246
00:09:30,901 --> 00:09:32,698
NOW, UNLESS THERE
IS ANY OBJECTION,
247
00:09:32,767 --> 00:09:34,565
I MOVE THAT THE BOARD
PASS THIS MEASURE.
248
00:09:34,634 --> 00:09:37,331
I'VE GOT AN OBJECTION,
AND SO DOES THIS MAN.
249
00:09:37,400 --> 00:09:38,965
[all murmuring]
250
00:09:39,034 --> 00:09:40,232
JAMES WOODS!
251
00:09:40,301 --> 00:09:41,798
OH, MY GOD.
I DON'T BELIEVE IT.
252
00:09:41,867 --> 00:09:43,598
HI. HOW ARE YOU?
HELLO, EVERYONE.
253
00:09:43,667 --> 00:09:45,065
HE BROUGHT JAMES WOODS HERE?
254
00:09:45,133 --> 00:09:46,365
WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING?
255
00:09:46,433 --> 00:09:48,331
BELIEVE ME, PETER DOES
STUPID THINGS ALL THE TIME.
256
00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:50,765
THAT'S WHY HE GOT FIRED
FROM THAT AIRLINE.
257
00:09:50,834 --> 00:09:52,364
COFFEE FOR YOU,
CAPT. GRIFFIN?
258
00:09:52,433 --> 00:09:53,732
THANK YOU, STEWARDESS.
259
00:09:53,801 --> 00:09:56,531
UM, HEY, WHERE ARE WE
RIGHT NOW?
260
00:09:56,600 --> 00:09:58,464
UH, ON AN AIRPLANE?
261
00:09:58,533 --> 00:10:01,732
NO. THIS ROOM.
WHAT IS THIS ROOM CALLED?
262
00:10:01,801 --> 00:10:03,131
THE FLIGHT DECK?
263
00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:04,699
NO.
264
00:10:04,767 --> 00:10:06,398
CONTROL ROOM?
265
00:10:06,466 --> 00:10:07,965
NO.
266
00:10:08,034 --> 00:10:09,131
COCKPIT?
267
00:10:12,401 --> 00:10:14,865
OH, GOD! I TOLD YOU
I'D GET HER TO SAY IT.
268
00:10:16,434 --> 00:10:17,999
OH, GOD!
269
00:10:18,067 --> 00:10:19,832
ALL RIGHT. GO ON.
GET OUT OF HERE.
270
00:10:19,901 --> 00:10:23,032
LOOK, I--I CAME AS SOON AS
PETER CONTACTED MY WEBSITE.
271
00:10:23,101 --> 00:10:24,398
LET--LET ME JUST SAY,
272
00:10:24,467 --> 00:10:27,265
I'M ALL IN FAVOR OF RENAMING
THE SCHOOL AFTER DR. KING.
273
00:10:27,334 --> 00:10:28,631
WHAT?
WOW!
274
00:10:28,700 --> 00:10:30,798
A BIG STAR AND YET SO HUMBLE.
275
00:10:30,867 --> 00:10:32,965
JAMES WOODS HIGH SCHOOL
IT REMAINS.
276
00:10:33,034 --> 00:10:34,565
WHAT?
YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS.
277
00:10:34,633 --> 00:10:36,599
YES! OH, THIS IS
MORE EXCITING
THAN THAT TIME
278
00:10:36,667 --> 00:10:38,565
I GOT TO RIDE
THE WASHING MACHINE.
279
00:10:38,634 --> 00:10:41,132
[machine whirring]
280
00:10:41,201 --> 00:10:43,232
[exclaiming]
281
00:10:50,367 --> 00:10:52,099
MAN,
WHAT A GREAT LUNCH, LOIS.
282
00:10:52,168 --> 00:10:54,098
THANK YOU SO MUCH
FOR HAVING ME OVER.
283
00:10:54,167 --> 00:10:56,732
WELL, IT'S NOT OFTEN
WE GET TO MEET CELEBRITIES.
284
00:10:56,800 --> 00:11:00,198
YEAH, EXCEPT WHEN I WAS
CHRISTINA AGUILERA'S MANAGER.
285
00:11:00,267 --> 00:11:02,464
♪[singing]
286
00:11:08,667 --> 00:11:11,132
OK, LET--LET ME
JUST GO AHEAD AND
STOP YOU RIGHT THERE.
287
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:12,732
YOU SOUND TERRIBLE,
ALL RIGHT?
288
00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:15,665
YOU--YOU'RE DOING THIS THING,
WHICH IS JUST, YOU KNOW...
289
00:11:15,734 --> 00:11:17,298
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?
I MEAN,
290
00:11:17,367 --> 00:11:19,132
AND--AND YOU LOOK LIKE
IF I TOUCHED YOU,
291
00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:21,498
YOU'D BE STICKY
AND FRANKLY, YOU SMELL BAD.
292
00:11:21,567 --> 00:11:23,665
YOU'RE PRETTY MUCH OFFENSIVE
TO ALL 5 SENSES.
293
00:11:23,734 --> 00:11:25,232
THAT'S ONLY 4.
294
00:11:25,300 --> 00:11:27,165
WELL, A-A-ACTUALLY,
YOU--YOU KNOW WHEN
YOU SMELL SOMETHING
295
00:11:27,234 --> 00:11:28,298
AND IT GETS
STUCK IN THERE
296
00:11:28,367 --> 00:11:29,865
AND YOU CAN SORT OF
TASTE IT?
297
00:11:29,934 --> 00:11:32,199
YEAH. WELL,
I'M TASTING YOU RIGHT NOW
AND IT TASTES AWFUL.
298
00:11:32,267 --> 00:11:35,232
TRULY DISGUSTING,
LIKE SALTY GARBAGE.
299
00:11:35,300 --> 00:11:37,032
YEAH, I TOTALLY TASTE IT.
300
00:11:38,500 --> 00:11:39,999
OH, BRIAN, THERE YOU ARE.
301
00:11:40,068 --> 00:11:41,532
LOOK WHO'S HERE FOR LUNCH.
302
00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:42,631
OH, HELLO, MR. WOODS.
303
00:11:42,701 --> 00:11:43,965
PETER TELLS ME
YOU'RE IN FILMS.
304
00:11:44,034 --> 00:11:47,298
PETER, CAN I TALK TO YOU
IN THE LIVING ROOM?
305
00:11:47,366 --> 00:11:49,665
I--I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WENT
TO THAT MUCH EFFORT
306
00:11:49,734 --> 00:11:50,732
JUST TO SABOTAGE ME.
307
00:11:50,801 --> 00:11:52,398
YOU--YOU'RE A JERK,
YOU KNOW THAT?
308
00:11:52,467 --> 00:11:54,799
LISTEN, AT LEAST I WASN'T
TRYING TO CHANGE
THE NAME OF THE SCHOOL
309
00:11:54,867 --> 00:11:55,998
TO IMPRESS MY GIRLFRIEND.
310
00:11:56,067 --> 00:11:57,699
NOW THAT IS NOT TRUE.
OH, YEAH?
311
00:11:57,767 --> 00:12:00,165
WELL, THEN WHY DID YOU
PICK MARTIN LUTHER KING, HUH?
312
00:12:00,234 --> 00:12:01,832
W-W-WHY NOT, UH,
R-RONALD REAGAN?
313
00:12:01,901 --> 00:12:04,531
HE WAS ALWAYS FUN,
ESPECIALLY IN HIS LATER YEARS.
314
00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:07,832
MR. GORBACHEV,
TEAR DOWN THIS WALL.
315
00:12:07,901 --> 00:12:09,398
TEAR IT DOWN.
316
00:12:09,467 --> 00:12:13,099
REAGAN SMASH. REAGAN SMASH.
317
00:12:15,968 --> 00:12:17,164
[banging on wall]
318
00:12:17,233 --> 00:12:18,298
WHAT'S THAT?
319
00:12:18,366 --> 00:12:19,699
OH, IT'S JUST REAGAN.
320
00:12:19,767 --> 00:12:21,731
JUST LEAVE HIM ALONE.
HE'LL TIRE HIMSELF OUT.
321
00:12:21,801 --> 00:12:23,865
REAGAN SLEEPY.
322
00:12:23,934 --> 00:12:25,532
YOU'RE AN ASS,
YOU KNOW THAT?
323
00:12:25,600 --> 00:12:27,798
YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS
BECAUSE I'M HANGING AROUND
WITH SOMEONE ELSE.
324
00:12:27,867 --> 00:12:29,898
HEY, I DON'T CARE, MAN.
GIRLS ARE STUPID ANYWAY.
325
00:12:29,967 --> 00:12:32,032
WELL, FINE. THEN MAYBE
I'LL GO SEE HER RIGHT NOW.
326
00:12:32,101 --> 00:12:34,365
FINE! I'LL JUST HANG OUT
WITH JAMES WOODS.
327
00:12:34,434 --> 00:12:36,532
WELL, PETER,
HEY, THANKS FOR LUNCH.
328
00:12:36,601 --> 00:12:38,532
GUESS I'LL BE HEADING
BACK TO OLD L.A. NOW.
329
00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:39,832
WHAT, YOU'RE LEAVING?
330
00:12:39,900 --> 00:12:41,932
OH, MAN, I THOUGHT MAYBE
YOU COULD STICK AROUND
331
00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:43,999
AND, YOU KNOW,
MAYBE YOU AND ME
COULD BE PALS.
332
00:12:44,068 --> 00:12:46,498
AH, YOU MEAN JUST HANG AROUND
LIKE REGULAR PEOPLE.
333
00:12:46,567 --> 00:12:47,765
REGULAR PEOPLE,
SURE, YEAH.
334
00:12:47,833 --> 00:12:49,932
WELL,
THAT DOES SOUND APPEALING.
335
00:12:50,001 --> 00:12:51,365
YOU KNOW WHAT?
336
00:12:51,433 --> 00:12:53,032
I'M GONNA CHECK
BACK INTO MY HOTEL.
337
00:12:53,101 --> 00:12:55,065
OH, SCREW THAT.
YOU'LL STAY WITH ME
RIGHT HERE.
338
00:12:55,134 --> 00:12:56,932
COME ON, WE'LL HAVE
A CAMPOUT IN THE YARD.
339
00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,166
WICKED COOL.
340
00:13:00,001 --> 00:13:02,699
HIS SWEATER WAS NEATLY FOLDED
ON THE GRAVE,
341
00:13:02,767 --> 00:13:04,132
SO WE WENT BACK TO THE CAR
342
00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:06,965
AND THE SEVERED HOOK WAS
HANGING FROM THE DOOR HANDLE
343
00:13:07,034 --> 00:13:09,965
BECAUSE THE CALLS WERE COMING
FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE.
344
00:13:10,034 --> 00:13:11,698
[both exclaim]
345
00:13:13,034 --> 00:13:15,065
OH, THAT'S
A SCARY STORY, PETER.
346
00:13:15,134 --> 00:13:17,598
IT'S ALMOST AS
SCARY AS...BOO!
347
00:13:18,567 --> 00:13:20,632
[laughing]
348
00:13:20,701 --> 00:13:21,832
BOY, JAMES WOODS,
349
00:13:21,900 --> 00:13:24,132
YOU'RE THE BEST FRIEND
A GUY COULD EVER HAVE.
350
00:13:24,201 --> 00:13:26,398
I FEEL THE SAME WAY
ABOUT YOU, PETER.
351
00:13:29,933 --> 00:13:32,165
♪ SOMEONE TO CARE FOR ♪
352
00:13:32,233 --> 00:13:33,665
♪ TO BE THERE FOR ♪
353
00:13:33,734 --> 00:13:36,532
♪ I HAVE JAMES WOODS ♪
354
00:13:37,267 --> 00:13:39,498
♪ SOMEONE TO DO FOR ♪
355
00:13:39,567 --> 00:13:41,065
♪ MUDDLE THROUGH FOR ♪
356
00:13:41,134 --> 00:13:43,799
♪ YOU HAVE JAMES WOODS ♪
357
00:13:44,534 --> 00:13:46,232
♪ SOMEONE TO SHARE ♪
358
00:13:46,301 --> 00:13:48,766
♪ JOY OR DESPAIR WITH ♪
359
00:13:48,834 --> 00:13:51,998
♪ WHICHEVER BETIDES YOU ♪
360
00:13:52,067 --> 00:13:55,631
♪ LIFE BECOMES A CHORE ♪
361
00:13:55,700 --> 00:13:59,298
(both)
♪ UNLESS YOU'RE LIVING FOR ♪
362
00:13:59,366 --> 00:14:03,232
♪ SOMEONE TO TEND TO
BE A FRIEND TO ♪
363
00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:05,932
♪ I HAVE JAMES WOODS ♪
364
00:14:06,768 --> 00:14:09,032
♪ SOMEONE TO STRIVE FOR ♪
365
00:14:09,100 --> 00:14:10,531
♪ DO OR DIE FOR ♪
366
00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:13,332
♪ YOU HAVE JAMES WOODS ♪
367
00:14:14,601 --> 00:14:16,232
(both)
♪ IT'S TRUE ♪
368
00:14:16,300 --> 00:14:18,398
(both)
♪ WE 2 ♪
369
00:14:18,467 --> 00:14:21,165
(both)
♪ HAVE A LIKEWISE
POINT OF VIEW ♪
370
00:14:21,234 --> 00:14:23,165
♪ 'CAUSE JAMES WOODS ♪
371
00:14:23,934 --> 00:14:25,165
♪ HAS YOU ♪
372
00:14:25,233 --> 00:14:27,532
♪ AND I HAVE JAMES WOODS ♪
373
00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:28,665
♪ TOO ♪
374
00:14:31,667 --> 00:14:33,399
SHAUNA?
375
00:14:33,467 --> 00:14:35,565
SHAUNA.
BRIAN, OVER HERE.
376
00:14:35,634 --> 00:14:37,032
I COULDN'T SAVE YOUR SEAT.
377
00:14:37,101 --> 00:14:38,699
I KNOW I'M LATE,
I APOLOGIZE.
378
00:14:38,768 --> 00:14:40,465
HELLO, FELLOW MOVIEGOER.
379
00:14:40,534 --> 00:14:42,332
SORRY,
I COULDN'T GET HIM TO MOVE.
380
00:14:42,401 --> 00:14:43,431
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
381
00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:44,866
OH, I JUST HAD IT OUT
WITH PETER.
382
00:14:44,934 --> 00:14:45,998
WOULD YOU LIKE
SOME CORN?
383
00:14:46,067 --> 00:14:47,132
I BROUGHT IT FROM HOME.
384
00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:48,699
PETER?
YOU'RE STILL NOT FRIENDS
385
00:14:48,767 --> 00:14:50,199
WITH THAT IDIOT
AFTER WHAT HE DID?
386
00:14:50,267 --> 00:14:52,765
WELL, I MEAN,
THAT MAY BE A LITTLE HARSH.
387
00:14:52,834 --> 00:14:54,331
I'M NOT GOING TO AVOID PETER
388
00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:55,732
LIKE THE DRUNK CHICK
AT A PARTY.
389
00:14:55,801 --> 00:14:59,398
I JUST SMOKED THE WRONG SIDE
OF A CIGARETTE!
390
00:14:59,467 --> 00:15:01,531
WHO WANTS TO GO SWIMMING?
391
00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:04,298
OH, THIS SONG IS ABOUT ME!
392
00:15:05,634 --> 00:15:07,665
LOOK, BRIAN,
PETER IS A JERK.
393
00:15:07,734 --> 00:15:10,365
AND AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED,
IT'S EITHER HIM OR ME.
394
00:15:10,434 --> 00:15:12,965
SHAUNA, COME ON, WHY YOU WANT
TO PLAY A BROTHER LIKE THAT?
395
00:15:13,034 --> 00:15:15,032
I THINK
I HAVE MY ANSWER.
396
00:15:15,101 --> 00:15:17,465
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I WILL HAVE SOME OF THAT.
397
00:15:17,533 --> 00:15:19,132
WHAT THE--
WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?
398
00:15:19,201 --> 00:15:20,331
CREAMED CORN.
399
00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,565
I BROUGHT IT FROM HOME,
BECAUSE I DON'T LIKE
400
00:15:22,633 --> 00:15:24,365
THE CREAMED CORN
THEY HAVE HERE.
401
00:15:24,433 --> 00:15:25,998
IT'S TOO CRUNCHY.
402
00:15:27,534 --> 00:15:28,565
[Brian sighing]
403
00:15:28,634 --> 00:15:30,231
PETER, I'M SORRY,
I WAS A JERK.
404
00:15:30,300 --> 00:15:32,132
LET'S BE FRIENDS AGAIN. OK.
405
00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:34,198
UH, PETER, CAN I, UH,
TALK TO YOU FOR A SECOND?
406
00:15:34,266 --> 00:15:35,832
(Peter)
WHAT IS IT, BRIAN?
407
00:15:35,900 --> 00:15:38,098
LISTEN,
I-I'M SORRY FOR EVERYTHING
THAT'S HAPPENED BETWEEN US,
408
00:15:38,167 --> 00:15:39,665
AND I--I FIGURE,
I DON'T KNOW,
409
00:15:39,733 --> 00:15:41,865
I THOUGHT MAYBE WE COULD BE
FRIENDS AGAIN, HUH?
410
00:15:41,934 --> 00:15:43,132
WHAT DO YOU SAY, HUH?
411
00:15:43,200 --> 00:15:45,098
I KIND OF MISS SLEEPING
AT THE FOOT OF YOUR BED.
412
00:15:45,167 --> 00:15:46,332
UH, I DON'T THINK SO.
413
00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:47,798
OH, COME ON,
CAN'T WE JUST GO--
414
00:15:47,867 --> 00:15:48,899
[gasps]
415
00:15:48,967 --> 00:15:50,232
I TRIED TO TELL YOU.
416
00:15:50,300 --> 00:15:52,365
THIS IS MY SPOT NOW, BRIAN.
417
00:15:52,434 --> 00:15:53,965
OH. I SEE.
418
00:15:58,433 --> 00:15:59,665
[sighs]
419
00:15:59,734 --> 00:16:01,732
LOOK, LOIS.
LOIS, LOOK, LOOK, LOOK.
420
00:16:01,801 --> 00:16:03,932
HE'S DREAMING HE'S RUNNING.
421
00:16:04,001 --> 00:16:05,798
[whimpering]
422
00:16:09,700 --> 00:16:11,165
OK, JAMES, YOU READY?
423
00:16:11,234 --> 00:16:13,498
NOW CATCH IT IN
YOUR MOUTH LIKE BRIAN.
424
00:16:14,667 --> 00:16:16,231
JAMES, YOU GOT TO BITE DOWN.
425
00:16:16,300 --> 00:16:17,898
I GOT A QUESTION, PETER.
426
00:16:17,967 --> 00:16:20,432
UH, MOTIVATION. WHAT'S, UH,
WHAT--WHAT IS MY MOTIVATION?
427
00:16:20,501 --> 00:16:21,632
JUST THROW IT BACK TO ME.
428
00:16:21,701 --> 00:16:23,232
YOU KNOW WHAT? THIS IS BORING.
429
00:16:23,301 --> 00:16:24,565
I GOT A BETTER IDEA.
430
00:16:24,634 --> 00:16:26,798
JAMES, UH, DO WE REALLY
HAVE TO WATCH VIDEODROME?
431
00:16:26,867 --> 00:16:28,865
YEAH, I THINK YOU'RE REALLY
GOING TO APPRECIATE
432
00:16:28,934 --> 00:16:30,732
ALL THE SUBTLE NUANCES
IN MY PERFORMANCE.
433
00:16:30,800 --> 00:16:32,365
SHH. OH, SEE? FOR EXAMPLE,
434
00:16:32,434 --> 00:16:34,632
SEE HOW EVEN THOUGH
THIS OTHER GUY IS TALKING,
435
00:16:34,701 --> 00:16:36,232
YOUR EYE IS DRAWN TO ME.
436
00:16:36,301 --> 00:16:38,498
OH, YEAH, THAT'S, UH,
THAT'S-- THAT'S NEAT.
437
00:16:38,567 --> 00:16:40,465
UM, IS THERE GOING
TO BE ANY NUDITY?
438
00:16:40,534 --> 00:16:42,265
YES, I, UH, I GET NAKED.
439
00:16:44,633 --> 00:16:47,065
YOU KNOW,
IT'S BAD ENOUGH THAT
PETER AND I WERE FIGHTING,
440
00:16:47,134 --> 00:16:48,832
BUT EVER SINCE
HE MET JAMES WOODS,
441
00:16:48,901 --> 00:16:50,332
IT'S LIKE
I DON'T EVEN EXIST.
442
00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:51,732
DO YOU REALLY CARE
ABOUT A MAN
443
00:16:51,801 --> 00:16:53,199
WHO USED TO TRY
AND PICK UP GIRLS
444
00:16:53,268 --> 00:16:54,932
AT THE MISS U.S.A. PAGEANT?
445
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:56,865
HEY, HOW'S IT GOING?
I'M PETER.
446
00:16:56,933 --> 00:16:58,431
YOU WANT TO
GO OUT SOMETIME?
447
00:16:58,500 --> 00:17:00,032
MAYBE YOU GOT
A SATURDAY NIGHT FREE--
448
00:17:00,101 --> 00:17:01,765
YOU KNOW WHAT?
TO HELL WITH YOU, THEN.
449
00:17:01,834 --> 00:17:03,165
YEAH, GO TO HELL.
GO TO HELL
450
00:17:03,234 --> 00:17:04,265
HEY, I'M PETER.
451
00:17:04,334 --> 00:17:05,365
WHAT DO YOU SAY
YOU AND ME
452
00:17:05,434 --> 00:17:07,432
GO GET A COUPLE OF BEERS, HUH?
MAYBE WE COULD--
453
00:17:07,501 --> 00:17:09,732
FINE. YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU GOT
MOSQUITO-BITE BOOBS ANYWAY.
454
00:17:09,800 --> 00:17:11,765
I DON'T CARE. I DON'T CARE.
I DON'T NEED YOU.
455
00:17:11,834 --> 00:17:13,398
HEY, HOW ARE YOU?
I'M PETER.
456
00:17:13,467 --> 00:17:15,665
I GOT A COUPON FOR SIZZLER
WITH YOUR NAME ON IT.
457
00:17:15,734 --> 00:17:16,865
MAYBE THE 2 OF US COULD--
458
00:17:16,934 --> 00:17:18,699
YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T CARE.
YOU'RE A BITCH.
459
00:17:18,767 --> 00:17:20,465
WELL, BRIAN, I KNOW
YOU'RE UPSET NOW,
460
00:17:20,534 --> 00:17:22,432
BUT IF THERE'S ANYTHING
I'VE LEARNED IN THIS LIFE,
461
00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:24,332
IS THAT YOU CAN'T LET
THE LITTLE THINGS--
462
00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:25,831
HEY! HEY!
463
00:17:25,901 --> 00:17:27,432
WHERE'S MY MONEY?
464
00:17:27,501 --> 00:17:29,231
DON'T YOU WALK OUT ON ME!
465
00:17:37,101 --> 00:17:38,165
HEY.
466
00:17:38,867 --> 00:17:40,132
HEY.
467
00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:42,265
SO, UH,
WHERE'S YOUR GOOD BUDDY,
JAMES WOODS?
468
00:17:42,334 --> 00:17:44,065
OH, TURNS OUT
HE WASN'T VERY GOOD
469
00:17:44,134 --> 00:17:45,865
AT CATCHING STUFF
WITH HIS MOUTH.
470
00:17:45,934 --> 00:17:47,099
WHERE'S YOUR GIRLFRIEND?
471
00:17:47,167 --> 00:17:48,266
UH, SAME PROBLEM.
472
00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:49,631
[both exclaim]
473
00:17:49,700 --> 00:17:51,165
[laughing]
474
00:18:03,167 --> 00:18:05,465
JAMES, UH,
W-WHAT, UH,
475
00:18:05,533 --> 00:18:07,198
W-W-WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
476
00:18:07,267 --> 00:18:08,364
WHAT'S GOING ON?
477
00:18:08,433 --> 00:18:09,698
HELLO, PETER.
478
00:18:09,767 --> 00:18:11,832
WOULD YOU LIKE
SOME COLD ROAST BEEF?
479
00:18:11,901 --> 00:18:15,065
UM, I--I,
W-W-WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
480
00:18:15,133 --> 00:18:17,331
I DON'T KNOW, PETER,
I HAD THIS CRAZY IDEA
481
00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:20,233
THAT YOU AND I WERE SUPPOSED
TO HAVE DINNER TONIGHT.
482
00:18:20,300 --> 00:18:22,198
BUT I GUESS YOU
HAD OTHER PLANS, HUH?
483
00:18:22,266 --> 00:18:24,598
WELL, YEAH. BRIAN AND I
WERE JUST AT THE CLAM.
484
00:18:24,667 --> 00:18:25,765
OH, THAT'S FUN.
485
00:18:25,834 --> 00:18:28,598
THAT SOUNDS LIKE
YOU HAD A FUN TIME.
486
00:18:28,667 --> 00:18:31,632
AND WHERE WOULD I FIT IN
WITH THE FUN TIME, HUH?
487
00:18:31,700 --> 00:18:35,698
WHERE DOES JAMES WOODS FIT
INTO THE FUN, YOU FUCKER?
488
00:18:35,767 --> 00:18:37,565
LOOK, JAMES, YOU'RE ACTING
KIND OF WEIRD.
489
00:18:37,633 --> 00:18:40,832
I'LL ACT HOWEVER I WANT
TO ACT, YOU SON OF A BITCH!
490
00:18:40,901 --> 00:18:42,532
I'M SORRY, PETER,
I DIDN'T MEAN THAT.
491
00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:44,066
BOY, I HAVEN'T BEEN
THIS CREEPED OUT
492
00:18:44,134 --> 00:18:45,765
SINCE I SAW THAT EPISODE
OF STAR TREK.
493
00:18:49,167 --> 00:18:50,565
NUMBER ONE.
YES, CAPTAIN.
494
00:18:50,634 --> 00:18:52,166
LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING.
495
00:18:52,233 --> 00:18:55,766
IF I WHISPERED IN YOUR EAR
THAT COMMANDER WORF'S HEAD
LOOKS LIKE A FANNY,
496
00:18:55,834 --> 00:18:57,599
WOULD YOU JOIN ME
IN A LAUGH?
497
00:18:57,667 --> 00:18:58,966
YEAH, I COULD
GET IN ON THAT.
498
00:18:59,034 --> 00:19:00,166
ALL RIGHT!
499
00:19:00,233 --> 00:19:01,832
HERE IT COMES!
500
00:19:01,901 --> 00:19:04,598
COMMANDER WORF'S HEAD
LOOKS LIKE A FANNY!
501
00:19:04,667 --> 00:19:06,331
[all laughing]
502
00:19:07,700 --> 00:19:09,766
YOU CAN BOTH
SUCK MY RIDGES.
503
00:19:09,834 --> 00:19:12,565
OH, GET A SENSE OF HUMOR,
ROCKY DENNIS.
504
00:19:12,633 --> 00:19:15,532
BOY, I TELL YOU, BRIAN,
JAMES WOODS HAS BEEN
GETTING KIND OF OBSESSIVE
505
00:19:15,601 --> 00:19:17,632
EVER SINCE YOU AND ME
STARTED HANGING OUT AGAIN.
506
00:19:17,700 --> 00:19:19,098
HOW ARE YOU
GOING TO HANDLE THAT?
507
00:19:19,167 --> 00:19:21,898
WE--WE, WE GOT TO,
WE GOT TO COME UP
WITH SOME CRAZY SCHEME
508
00:19:21,967 --> 00:19:23,832
LIKE THE KIDS ON
THAT '70S SHOW.
509
00:19:23,901 --> 00:19:26,133
AND I THINK I GOT IT.
510
00:19:40,700 --> 00:19:42,865
ALL RIGHT, THAT'S THE LAST
OF THE REESE'S PIECES.
511
00:19:42,934 --> 00:19:44,898
GOOD. NOW WE WAIT.
512
00:19:45,801 --> 00:19:48,465
PETER? OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
513
00:19:48,534 --> 00:19:50,098
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
514
00:19:50,167 --> 00:19:51,499
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
515
00:19:51,567 --> 00:19:53,032
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
516
00:19:53,101 --> 00:19:54,532
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
517
00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:55,998
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
518
00:19:56,067 --> 00:19:57,465
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
519
00:19:57,534 --> 00:19:58,832
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
520
00:19:58,900 --> 00:20:00,198
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
521
00:20:00,267 --> 00:20:01,765
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
522
00:20:01,833 --> 00:20:03,132
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
523
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:04,498
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
524
00:20:04,567 --> 00:20:06,165
OOH, A PIECE OF CANDY!
525
00:20:09,500 --> 00:20:10,799
MAN, I HOPE
THAT'S JAMES WOODS.
526
00:20:10,868 --> 00:20:12,365
'CAUSE IF IT'S ME
UNDER THERE AGAIN,
527
00:20:12,433 --> 00:20:13,732
I'M GONNA BE
REALLY PISSED OFF.
528
00:20:16,100 --> 00:20:18,465
AH, IT'S GOOD TO HAVE YOU
BACK IN THAT SPOT, BRIAN.
529
00:20:18,534 --> 00:20:19,832
IT'S GOOD TO BE BACK, PETER.
530
00:20:19,901 --> 00:20:22,398
BY THE WAY, WHAT DID YOU END
UP DOING WITH JAMES WOODS?
531
00:20:22,467 --> 00:20:25,132
DON'T WORRY, BRIAN.
HE'S BEING EXAMINED
BY TOP MEN.
532
00:20:25,201 --> 00:20:26,231
WHO?
533
00:20:26,300 --> 00:20:27,932
TOP MEN.