1
00:00:36,068 --> 00:00:37,932
Oh, Peter,
you're selling your anvil?
2
00:00:38,001 --> 00:00:40,365
Yeah, I've had
a lot of good times
with this thing.
3
00:00:42,567 --> 00:00:44,032
(CHUCKLING)
4
00:00:44,101 --> 00:00:46,164
Oh, a dollar!
5
00:00:46,233 --> 00:00:48,866
Hey, there, Chris.
Hi, Mr. Herbert.
6
00:00:48,934 --> 00:00:51,465
Selling your
old hand-me-downs?
Yep.
7
00:00:51,534 --> 00:00:54,365
You got anything
you used to wear
in the summertime?
8
00:00:54,434 --> 00:00:57,999
Just these old shorts.
Sweet Jesus.
9
00:00:58,068 --> 00:01:01,198
You know, Brian.
I'm looking forward to getting
rid of some of this crap.
10
00:01:01,267 --> 00:01:04,966
Like this movie,
Stimy Gruffin,
The Untold Story.
11
00:01:05,034 --> 00:01:09,032
It's not a movie at all,
Brian. Just three episodes,
back to back.
12
00:01:09,100 --> 00:01:10,498
This thing is an insult.
13
00:01:10,567 --> 00:01:12,866
Well, that might be
overstating things a little.
14
00:01:12,934 --> 00:01:15,232
It's a middle finger
to the fans, is what it is.
15
00:01:15,301 --> 00:01:17,331
I tell you,
Fox should be...
16
00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:20,531
Give you $1 for this.
Sold.
17
00:01:23,767 --> 00:01:26,698
Brian, where's Rupert?
I just left him here
to watch my things.
18
00:01:26,767 --> 00:01:27,798
Uh-oh.
19
00:01:27,868 --> 00:01:29,765
What?
Nothing, I haven't seen him.
20
00:01:29,834 --> 00:01:34,166
It's not like him
to wander off. Rupert?
Rupert! Oh, no.
21
00:01:34,235 --> 00:01:36,432
What if he's been kidnapped?
Well, let's just calm down.
22
00:01:36,501 --> 00:01:38,599
I've got to save him, Brian.
What if he's dead?
23
00:01:38,667 --> 00:01:41,998
I don't think
I can handle a funeral.
24
00:01:42,067 --> 00:01:46,199
Of all the souls I have
encountered in my travels,
his was the most
25
00:01:47,901 --> 00:01:49,098
human.
26
00:01:49,167 --> 00:01:50,632
MAN: Orders.
27
00:01:50,701 --> 00:01:52,365
(BAGPIPE PLAYING
AMAZING GRACE)
28
00:02:20,201 --> 00:02:22,631
Holy crap.
Evel Knievel gloves.
29
00:02:22,701 --> 00:02:24,198
I bet I could do
a wheelie with these.
30
00:02:24,267 --> 00:02:26,065
How much for the gloves?
Peter, those are yours.
31
00:02:26,134 --> 00:02:29,831
$10, $2, $7, $4,
$5.50, $10. Sold.
32
00:02:29,900 --> 00:02:33,265
Sucker. I would've gone
to $15, easy. I am so stupid.
33
00:02:33,900 --> 00:02:35,699
Awesome.
34
00:02:35,767 --> 00:02:38,799
Peter, you can't drive a car
over that.
You're gonna get hurt.
35
00:02:38,868 --> 00:02:41,999
Lois, I don't come down
to Burger King and tell you
how to do your job.
36
00:02:42,068 --> 00:02:43,099
Peter, I don't work
at Burger...
37
00:02:43,168 --> 00:02:46,032
"I don't work at Burger..."
I'm busy.
38
00:02:46,101 --> 00:02:49,365
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have some death to defy.
39
00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:02,265
Wow. This is just like
what happened with
Matthew Broderick,
40
00:03:02,401 --> 00:03:03,631
except no one's dead.
41
00:03:06,467 --> 00:03:08,665
(DOORBELL RINGING)
42
00:03:08,734 --> 00:03:10,465
Hey, Joe.
Good morning, Peter.
43
00:03:10,534 --> 00:03:13,365
I'm here to revoke
your driver's license.
What? Why?
44
00:03:13,434 --> 00:03:16,065
We got reckless driving,
disturbing the peace,
45
00:03:16,134 --> 00:03:18,798
plus the driver of
one of those other cars
was a virgin
46
00:03:18,867 --> 00:03:21,532
whose hymen was busted
by the airbag, so rape.
47
00:03:21,601 --> 00:03:24,165
Okay, well, I guess
you can take my license.
48
00:03:24,234 --> 00:03:25,398
'Course, it's
all the way up here.
49
00:03:25,467 --> 00:03:26,998
Peter, knock it off.
Give it to me.
50
00:03:27,067 --> 00:03:28,465
Right here.
Here you go, Officer.
Give me the damn license.
51
00:03:28,534 --> 00:03:29,798
Don't you want it? Here.
52
00:03:29,867 --> 00:03:31,465
This is in poor taste, Peter.
Having some trouble there?
53
00:03:31,534 --> 00:03:33,398
You're starting
to piss me off.
All you gotta do is take it.
54
00:03:33,467 --> 00:03:34,932
You're starting
to piss me off!
It's right here.
55
00:03:38,201 --> 00:03:41,498
Oh, man, this sucks.
I got no license.
I can't go anywhere.
56
00:03:41,567 --> 00:03:44,632
Well, this is
your own fault, Peter,
and if you want my opinion,
57
00:03:44,701 --> 00:03:47,732
a little time
away from the bar
will do you some good.
58
00:03:47,801 --> 00:03:50,298
I'll show her.
I'll just go to another bar.
59
00:03:50,367 --> 00:03:52,265
MAN ON TV:
We now return to Cheers.
60
00:03:52,333 --> 00:03:53,665
Norm.
Norm.
61
00:03:53,733 --> 00:03:55,399
And Peter. Yeah.
62
00:03:55,467 --> 00:03:58,099
How's life in the fast lane,
Mr. Peterson?
Griffin.
63
00:03:58,168 --> 00:03:59,798
I can't find
the on-ramp, Woody.
64
00:03:59,867 --> 00:04:04,099
He was talking to me, Norm.
Quit stealing
my punch lines, you fat drunk.
65
00:04:04,167 --> 00:04:07,798
That show stopped being funny
after Kirstie Alley
ate Shelley Long.
66
00:04:07,867 --> 00:04:11,765
Oh, man, now I can't even
watch TV. What the hell
am I gonna do all day?
67
00:04:11,834 --> 00:04:14,132
That's all right, that's okay.
I don't need TV.
68
00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:16,265
I'll just make
my own sitcom in my head.
69
00:04:16,334 --> 00:04:19,199
And I'll give it
an upbeat '80s sitcom theme.
70
00:04:22,333 --> 00:04:25,099
♪ This time around
I'm staying at home
71
00:04:25,168 --> 00:04:28,265
♪ And things
are gonna get better
72
00:04:28,334 --> 00:04:31,298
♪ Settling in,
loving my wife
73
00:04:31,367 --> 00:04:34,598
♪ But then I got that letter
74
00:04:34,667 --> 00:04:37,498
♪ My black son, my black son
75
00:04:37,567 --> 00:04:40,832
♪ Now each day my heart
is getting bigger
76
00:04:40,901 --> 00:04:45,398
♪ Don't even remember
sleeping with that lady,
but I did
77
00:04:45,466 --> 00:04:48,564
♪ My black son,
he's coming to stay
78
00:04:48,633 --> 00:04:53,832
♪ My black son,
he's making each day
79
00:04:53,901 --> 00:04:55,498
♪ The best that he can
80
00:04:55,567 --> 00:04:57,232
♪ Also, he's a ninja ♪
81
00:05:01,466 --> 00:05:03,265
What the hell's
wrong with you?
82
00:05:03,333 --> 00:05:08,398
I'm so distraught
over losing Rupert I needed
something to calm me down.
83
00:05:08,467 --> 00:05:10,331
This is an entire bottle
of NyQuil.
84
00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:13,565
I know,
and it's doing wonders.
85
00:05:13,634 --> 00:05:17,431
Come here, puss.
Come here.
86
00:05:17,500 --> 00:05:21,999
Come here, puss.
Here, puss.
87
00:05:22,068 --> 00:05:24,699
What are you doing?
Calling the cat.
88
00:05:24,767 --> 00:05:27,699
We don't have a cat.
That's a throw pillow.
89
00:05:27,767 --> 00:05:29,498
(CRYING)
90
00:05:38,001 --> 00:05:40,198
Why have you brought me
to the toy store, Brian?
91
00:05:40,267 --> 00:05:41,731
I'm buying you
another Rupert.
92
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:43,232
Hey, this one's cute, huh?
93
00:05:43,301 --> 00:05:46,132
And if we buy it,
they save a real gorilla
in the wild.
94
00:05:46,200 --> 00:05:49,331
And if we don't,
they kill one. Wow, these guys
are playing hardball.
95
00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:53,198
You can't just take some
Korean-made velveteen primate
and call it Rupert.
96
00:05:53,266 --> 00:05:56,932
Now, come on, this is all time
we could be using
to find Rupert's kidnappers.
97
00:05:57,001 --> 00:06:00,099
Look, I may as well
come clean with you.
98
00:06:00,167 --> 00:06:01,798
Rupert wasn't kidnapped.
99
00:06:01,867 --> 00:06:05,065
I accidentally sold him
at the yard sale.
100
00:06:05,133 --> 00:06:07,232
You son of a bitch!
101
00:06:07,301 --> 00:06:08,765
(WAILING)
102
00:06:14,101 --> 00:06:16,465
Come on, Stewie,
I'm really sorry.
It was an accident.
103
00:06:16,534 --> 00:06:19,198
Damn you, Brian.
How could you sell Rupert?
104
00:06:19,267 --> 00:06:22,632
What you've done
is more horrible than sex
with Sharon Stone.
105
00:06:22,700 --> 00:06:24,232
Wow, that was great.
106
00:06:24,301 --> 00:06:26,232
One minute I'm filling up
at Chevron,
107
00:06:26,301 --> 00:06:28,333
and the next I'm having sex
with Sharon Stone.
108
00:06:28,401 --> 00:06:30,898
Yeah. Now comes
the best part.
109
00:06:39,067 --> 00:06:42,966
Get out of the fridge, Peter.
There is no Peter,
only Zuul.
110
00:06:43,034 --> 00:06:45,898
I said get out of the fridge.
All right, all right.
111
00:06:45,967 --> 00:06:49,732
Jeez, Lois, I'm just trying
to amuse myself, since I don't
have a damn driver's license.
112
00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:53,332
Look, Peter, it's getting
a little annoying having you
around the house all the time.
113
00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:56,599
So you'll be happy to know
I got you
your own personal driver.
114
00:06:56,667 --> 00:06:59,332
My own driver?
Holy crap, that's awesome.
115
00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:01,932
Where is he?
She's right here, Peter.
116
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:03,632
Meg?
Yeah, Dad.
117
00:07:03,701 --> 00:07:05,599
I don't mind
driving you around till
you get your license back.
118
00:07:05,667 --> 00:07:08,099
What? Lois, this is the best
you could do?
119
00:07:08,167 --> 00:07:11,065
Well, it was either Meg
or a talking monkey
smoking a cigar,
120
00:07:11,134 --> 00:07:12,999
but I didn't think
you'd like that.
121
00:07:13,067 --> 00:07:15,431
I've already
accepted another job.
122
00:07:15,500 --> 00:07:18,598
Lois, you picked
the opposite thing
that I would like.
123
00:07:18,667 --> 00:07:21,364
It's all right.
I would've driven you bananas.
124
00:07:21,433 --> 00:07:24,098
Oh, and he makes jokes.
Nice going, Lois.
125
00:07:24,167 --> 00:07:25,732
(WHINES)
Dad, are you ready?
126
00:07:29,501 --> 00:07:32,266
What exactly
are you trying to do?
It's very simple, Brian.
127
00:07:32,335 --> 00:07:35,498
I've taken DNA
from the dollar bill
you were paid for Rupert.
128
00:07:35,567 --> 00:07:38,698
Now to check that DNA
against the federal database.
129
00:07:38,767 --> 00:07:39,966
(BEEPS)
We have a match.
130
00:07:40,034 --> 00:07:43,032
"Stanford Cordray,
89 Spooner Street."
131
00:07:43,101 --> 00:07:45,331
Well, that's only
a few blocks away. Let's go!
132
00:07:49,967 --> 00:07:51,065
(DOORBELL RINGING)
133
00:07:51,134 --> 00:07:52,599
Hello? Hello?
134
00:07:54,601 --> 00:07:56,631
It can't be.
This house is deserted.
135
00:07:57,767 --> 00:07:59,866
He moved. He's gone.
136
00:07:59,934 --> 00:08:01,466
Rupert's gone.
137
00:08:01,534 --> 00:08:05,198
Wait a minute. Look!
The moving truck.
138
00:08:05,267 --> 00:08:07,999
We're not too late.
Hey! Hey!
139
00:08:09,900 --> 00:08:11,732
Can I help you, gentlemen?
140
00:08:11,801 --> 00:08:13,765
Follow that truck.
141
00:08:13,834 --> 00:08:15,531
Didn't you hear me?
I said, "Follow that truck."
142
00:08:15,601 --> 00:08:19,565
Oh, I heard you.
What I didn't hear
was "please."
143
00:08:19,634 --> 00:08:20,999
Please follow the truck.
Please follow the truck.
144
00:08:21,067 --> 00:08:22,699
(TIRES SQUEALING)
145
00:08:24,233 --> 00:08:26,765
I always enjoy
traveling companions.
146
00:08:26,834 --> 00:08:30,865
Let's play 20 questions.
Am I Bo Bice? Yes, I am.
147
00:08:30,934 --> 00:08:33,799
Well played,
worthy adversary.
148
00:08:39,734 --> 00:08:42,498
We're gaining on him.
I'm coming, Rupert.
149
00:08:45,834 --> 00:08:47,965
I'm sorry,
but I can go no further.
150
00:08:48,034 --> 00:08:49,232
What? Why not?
151
00:08:49,301 --> 00:08:50,799
If I enter Connecticut,
152
00:08:50,867 --> 00:08:54,265
I'm entering every state
that Connecticut's
ever been with.
153
00:08:54,334 --> 00:08:56,331
Good luck,
brave travelers.
154
00:08:58,934 --> 00:09:01,431
No! We were so close.
155
00:09:06,134 --> 00:09:09,732
I say, what a bit
of serendipity. Now we've
got that fellow's address.
156
00:09:09,801 --> 00:09:12,065
Let's see.
"Aspen, Colorado."
157
00:09:12,134 --> 00:09:14,698
Well, you can forget that.
We're not going
all the way to Aspen.
158
00:09:14,767 --> 00:09:17,066
What? But I can't leave
Rupert to perish.
159
00:09:17,134 --> 00:09:19,598
For the rest of my life,
I'll be as lonely
as Pat Robertson
160
00:09:19,667 --> 00:09:21,998
and Jerry Falwell,
after the rapture.
161
00:09:22,067 --> 00:09:24,531
Damn it, Jerry,
why are we the only ones
still here?
162
00:09:24,600 --> 00:09:26,531
I don't know. We hated
all the right things.
163
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:27,966
Now there's nothing
left to hate.
164
00:09:28,034 --> 00:09:30,298
I'm gonna hate that rock.
No, I'm gonna hate that rock.
165
00:09:30,367 --> 00:09:31,531
Let's both hate that rock.
166
00:09:31,600 --> 00:09:33,698
I hate you.
I hate you, too.
167
00:09:37,267 --> 00:09:38,931
Look, Stewie.
168
00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:41,132
Don't you think at some point
you're going to have
to let Rupert go?
169
00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:43,132
I mean,
you are getting a little old
to have a teddy bear.
170
00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:44,231
Brian, I'm one.
171
00:09:44,300 --> 00:09:45,931
Still?
What?
172
00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:48,232
Look, I'm not going
to Colorado. I'm turning
around and going home.
173
00:09:48,301 --> 00:09:49,865
Fine, then.
I'll go by myself.
174
00:09:49,934 --> 00:09:51,732
See you from the back
of my milk carton.
175
00:09:51,801 --> 00:09:54,932
Want that
on your conscience, Brian?
Try explaining this to Lois.
176
00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:56,365
You'll wind up
in a dumpster
177
00:09:56,434 --> 00:09:58,832
with a bunch of slow,
unadoptable greyhounds.
178
00:09:58,901 --> 00:10:01,265
Don't joke about that.
That's like the holocaust
to us.
179
00:10:01,333 --> 00:10:03,665
Yeah, well, when greyhounds
start running
the New York Times,
180
00:10:03,734 --> 00:10:05,731
and the World Bank,
I'll be more inclined
to believe you.
181
00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:08,332
Now, are you coming or not?
Fine.
182
00:10:11,767 --> 00:10:16,265
♪ Take to the highway
Won't you lend me your name ♪
183
00:10:16,334 --> 00:10:18,132
Who sings that song?
James Taylor.
184
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:19,332
Yeah, let's keep it
that way.
185
00:10:20,733 --> 00:10:22,032
This sucks.
186
00:10:22,101 --> 00:10:24,331
Can you believe I'm stuck
with Meg driving me around?
187
00:10:24,400 --> 00:10:26,431
Dad, it's just you and me
in the car.
188
00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:29,665
Yeah, don't remind me.
It's bad enough
I got a suspended license.
189
00:10:29,734 --> 00:10:32,231
I gotta ride around town
with Stinky McPoop-Pants.
190
00:10:32,300 --> 00:10:35,498
I want apple juice.
Dad, you left your apple juice
at home.
191
00:10:35,567 --> 00:10:37,899
I want apple juice!
192
00:10:37,968 --> 00:10:40,966
You wanna watch SpongeBob?
Yes.
193
00:10:41,034 --> 00:10:42,732
With apple juice.
194
00:10:42,801 --> 00:10:47,599
♪ C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song
C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song ♪
195
00:10:47,667 --> 00:10:48,832
(CHUCKLING)
196
00:10:48,900 --> 00:10:50,232
SpongeBob.
197
00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:52,032
(CHUCKLING)
198
00:10:52,101 --> 00:10:53,132
(GROANS ANGRILY)
199
00:10:55,667 --> 00:10:56,999
Thanks for the ride, Bandit.
200
00:10:57,067 --> 00:11:02,598
Good luck tapping some of that
hot, hot Sally Field tail.
201
00:11:02,667 --> 00:11:05,532
Knock it off. I don't like it
any more than you do.
202
00:11:06,566 --> 00:11:07,765
Where the hell are we?
203
00:11:10,601 --> 00:11:14,332
Oh, this is history
right here, Brian.
Gettysburg. Billy Yanks.
204
00:11:14,401 --> 00:11:18,632
The 20th Maine.
So many lives lost. All in
pursuit of the ideal that
205
00:11:18,701 --> 00:11:21,999
no man should be
subjugated because
of the color of his skin.
206
00:11:22,067 --> 00:11:26,866
These boys paid
the ultimate price here.
For equality. For humanity.
207
00:11:26,934 --> 00:11:29,132
You're welcome.
I'm sorry?
208
00:11:29,201 --> 00:11:31,532
I'm just saying,
make it worth our while,
you know?
209
00:11:31,601 --> 00:11:34,999
We wrote a pretty big check
for you folks here, so...
210
00:11:35,067 --> 00:11:38,299
You know, whatever.
It's fine. It's fine.
Doesn't matter. Just...
211
00:11:38,368 --> 00:11:40,532
I just hope
you're making the best
of what we gave you here.
212
00:11:40,601 --> 00:11:43,366
I would say that
given the events
that preceded it,
213
00:11:43,434 --> 00:11:46,198
the couple 100 years
or so, maybe
we're about even.
214
00:11:46,267 --> 00:11:47,865
Yeah, no, no.
We gave more.
215
00:11:51,433 --> 00:11:53,665
Hey, Cleveland,
who would you rather do?
216
00:11:53,734 --> 00:11:57,632
Queen Latifah or Halle Berry,
but she's been dead
for six hours?
217
00:11:57,701 --> 00:12:00,432
Oh, man,
that's a tough one.
218
00:12:00,500 --> 00:12:01,966
What did she die of?
219
00:12:02,034 --> 00:12:04,999
I've seen some bodies
that have been dead
for six hours.
220
00:12:05,068 --> 00:12:06,231
Some of them aren't too bad.
221
00:12:06,300 --> 00:12:07,632
Oh, then Halle Berry.
222
00:12:07,700 --> 00:12:10,532
God, will you guys
just shut up back there?
223
00:12:10,600 --> 00:12:12,299
(ALL SNICKERING)
224
00:12:12,368 --> 00:12:15,765
Ow! Gross!
Would you stop it? Stop it!
225
00:12:15,834 --> 00:12:17,765
Hey, guys, check this out.
226
00:12:20,767 --> 00:12:24,232
Hey, Meg, don't be
such a hothead.
What?
227
00:12:24,300 --> 00:12:27,965
Hey, Meg, you sure
look hot today.
What?
228
00:12:28,034 --> 00:12:30,532
Hey, Meg,
I lit your scalp on fire.
229
00:12:30,601 --> 00:12:31,798
(SCREAMING)
230
00:12:31,867 --> 00:12:33,732
Don't worry, I'll put it out.
231
00:12:35,367 --> 00:12:37,264
(GROANING ANGRILY)
232
00:12:39,934 --> 00:12:42,966
What the hell is your problem,
you dumb bimbo?
233
00:12:43,034 --> 00:12:44,565
(GROWLING)
234
00:12:44,634 --> 00:12:46,598
Oh! Oh, God, stop!
235
00:12:46,667 --> 00:12:48,564
(SCREAMING)
236
00:12:53,434 --> 00:12:57,032
Meg, that was awesome.
237
00:12:57,101 --> 00:12:59,865
♪ On the road again
238
00:12:59,934 --> 00:13:04,232
♪ Just can't wait to get
on road again
239
00:13:04,300 --> 00:13:07,965
♪ The life I love is making
music with my friends
240
00:13:08,034 --> 00:13:10,965
♪ I can't wait
to get on the road again ♪
241
00:13:13,234 --> 00:13:14,498
If we wanna get to Aspen,
242
00:13:14,567 --> 00:13:16,632
we're gonna have to get over
those mountains somehow.
243
00:13:19,134 --> 00:13:21,565
Excuse me, how much is it
to rent a helicopter?
244
00:13:21,634 --> 00:13:24,398
It's $10 an hour. But there's
a $100,000 deposit.
245
00:13:24,467 --> 00:13:26,499
Oh, God.
Looks like we're walking.
246
00:13:26,567 --> 00:13:30,131
Wait a minute, it says here
you accept cash, check
or a jaunty tune.
247
00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:32,565
Well, this rental agreement
was drafted back when
248
00:13:32,634 --> 00:13:34,732
musicals were
culturally relevant.
249
00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:37,065
Unfortunately,
that's no longer the case.
250
00:13:37,134 --> 00:13:40,299
Well, I can prove to you
that's a whole lot
of nonsense.
251
00:13:42,067 --> 00:13:46,498
♪ You may think that
song and dance is dated,
boring and dry
252
00:13:46,567 --> 00:13:50,932
♪ But you might just
learn to like it
if you give it a try
253
00:13:51,001 --> 00:13:54,865
♪ You could laugh
and sing and dance
as gaily as an elf
254
00:13:54,934 --> 00:13:59,298
♪ But just in case
you don't believe me
Ask the man himself
255
00:13:59,366 --> 00:14:01,665
Mr. Kelly? Will you show us?
256
00:14:01,733 --> 00:14:03,565
I'll show you.
Let's do it.
257
00:14:03,634 --> 00:14:05,165
♪ Good
One, two, three, four
258
00:14:05,234 --> 00:14:06,298
♪ One, two, three, four
259
00:14:06,367 --> 00:14:08,332
♪ One, two, three
♪ One, two, three
260
00:14:08,401 --> 00:14:10,199
(BOTH SINGING)
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la ♪
261
00:14:10,268 --> 00:14:12,665
You see?
It's easy.
262
00:15:45,601 --> 00:15:47,832
Look at me. I'm dancing.
263
00:16:03,134 --> 00:16:05,099
Okay, you can
have the helicopter.
264
00:16:09,267 --> 00:16:13,532
Brian, be careful
'cause the mountains
are the same color as the sky.
265
00:16:13,600 --> 00:16:15,165
What?
I said,
266
00:16:15,234 --> 00:16:18,099
"Be careful
'cause the mountains
are the same color as the..."
267
00:16:18,168 --> 00:16:21,032
(SCREAMING)
268
00:16:21,101 --> 00:16:24,132
What the hell was that?
I'm practicing
my comedy crash.
269
00:16:24,201 --> 00:16:25,765
Well, keep it down
'cause I'm trying to...
270
00:16:25,834 --> 00:16:27,431
(BOTH SCREAMING)
271
00:16:32,967 --> 00:16:34,698
(BOTH SCREAMING)
272
00:16:44,134 --> 00:16:45,732
(LAUGHING)
273
00:16:47,067 --> 00:16:48,999
(BOTH SCREAMING)
274
00:16:52,268 --> 00:16:56,331
STEWIE: Imagine the dance
I'm gonna have to do to
get our security deposit back.
275
00:17:02,667 --> 00:17:04,565
(PANTING)
276
00:17:04,633 --> 00:17:07,598
Oh, my God. Brian, look.
277
00:17:07,667 --> 00:17:09,365
It's Aspen. We made it.
278
00:17:09,433 --> 00:17:12,133
Well, it looks like
you're gonna be reunited
with Rupert after all.
279
00:17:12,201 --> 00:17:15,233
And just in time, too.
I can't keep my teeth
from chattering.
280
00:17:15,300 --> 00:17:16,331
(CHATTERING)
281
00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:17,433
Isn't that fun?
282
00:17:17,500 --> 00:17:18,865
I got these
at Jack's Joke Shop
283
00:17:18,934 --> 00:17:20,433
in South Attleboro,
Massachusetts.
284
00:17:20,500 --> 00:17:22,565
Remember, if it ain't funny,
it ain't worth jack.
285
00:17:22,634 --> 00:17:24,731
(GROANING)
Bitch.
286
00:17:27,567 --> 00:17:30,499
Why, you should have seen
what our amazing
freaking daughter did
287
00:17:30,567 --> 00:17:32,565
to that guy, Lois.
She kicked his ass.
288
00:17:32,634 --> 00:17:34,565
It was like what
life did to Dana Plato.
289
00:17:34,634 --> 00:17:38,465
Meg, how could you do that?
You should call that man
and apologize.
290
00:17:38,534 --> 00:17:41,032
Hey, hey, hey,
don't you talk
to her like that.
291
00:17:41,101 --> 00:17:43,364
Meg's as cool
as the other side
of the pillow.
292
00:17:45,667 --> 00:17:48,432
Billy Dee Williams.
Hello, Peter.
293
00:17:48,500 --> 00:17:53,065
Welcome to the cool side
of the pillow.
You've had a hard day.
294
00:17:53,134 --> 00:17:57,398
Rest that weary head of yours
and drift on off to dreamland.
295
00:17:58,634 --> 00:18:02,099
Works every time.
296
00:18:02,168 --> 00:18:04,965
Well, this is the place.
Looks pretty fancy.
297
00:18:06,267 --> 00:18:07,398
(DOORBELL RINGING)
298
00:18:07,467 --> 00:18:10,832
Can I help you?
Ah, yes, my name's Brian.
299
00:18:10,900 --> 00:18:12,432
Look, to make
a long story short,
300
00:18:12,500 --> 00:18:15,832
I accidentally
sold you a teddy bear
back in Rhode Island,
301
00:18:15,900 --> 00:18:18,865
and I kind of need it back.
302
00:18:20,667 --> 00:18:23,698
Rupert! It's Rupert.
Stanford, who is it?
303
00:18:23,767 --> 00:18:25,765
It's nothing, dear.
I'll handle it.
304
00:18:25,834 --> 00:18:29,265
I'm sorry, but that bear
belongs to Timmy.
Now, please leave.
305
00:18:31,334 --> 00:18:34,798
Wait, wait,
how about a ski-off?
What?
306
00:18:34,867 --> 00:18:37,331
You heard me. First one
down the mountain wins.
307
00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:41,332
If I win, I get Rupert.
Interesting.
What do I get if I win?
308
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:44,065
My dog.
What can he do?
309
00:18:45,934 --> 00:18:49,532
If you put peanut butter
anywhere on your body,
he'll lick it off.
310
00:18:50,400 --> 00:18:52,365
Anywhere.
311
00:18:52,434 --> 00:18:56,198
Hmm. Well, I did go to Choate.
All right, it's a deal.
312
00:18:56,267 --> 00:18:59,798
♪ She's the kind of girl
who's not too shy
313
00:18:59,867 --> 00:19:03,531
♪ And I can tell
I'm her kind of guy
314
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:07,432
♪ She danced close to me
like I hoped she would
315
00:19:07,501 --> 00:19:10,532
♪ She danced with me
like I hoped she would
316
00:19:10,601 --> 00:19:14,565
♪ Somethin' tells me
I'm into something good
317
00:19:14,633 --> 00:19:20,231
♪ Somethin' tells me
I'm into something good ♪
318
00:19:20,300 --> 00:19:22,865
You know, Dad,
it's been really great
hanging out with you.
319
00:19:22,934 --> 00:19:25,832
I know there's probably
a million things
you'd rather be doing.
320
00:19:25,900 --> 00:19:28,665
Are you kidding, Meg?
I've had more fun
with you than I did
321
00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:31,832
going to see
Lost in Translation
with Cleveland and Quagmire.
322
00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:34,531
What do you think
he whispered to her?
323
00:19:34,600 --> 00:19:37,165
I'll bet it was
just right.
324
00:19:37,234 --> 00:19:41,333
Look, I know sometimes
I give you a hard time.
You know, calling you names,
325
00:19:41,401 --> 00:19:44,999
reading your diary,
farting in your cereal
when you go to get milk
326
00:19:45,068 --> 00:19:48,465
and then laughing,
"She doesn't know
she's eating my fart".
327
00:19:48,533 --> 00:19:53,698
But, you know, Meg,
I'm starting to realize I got
a really wonderful daughter.
328
00:19:53,767 --> 00:19:55,298
Thanks, Dad.
329
00:19:55,366 --> 00:19:59,665
Peter, good news.
Your suspension is up. You can
have your license back.
330
00:19:59,734 --> 00:20:04,431
You mean it? I'm free?
No more getting
driven around? Oh, sweet.
331
00:20:04,500 --> 00:20:07,032
So, I guess this means
you don't need me anymore.
332
00:20:07,101 --> 00:20:09,665
You'll probably go back
to treating me like crap, huh?
333
00:20:09,734 --> 00:20:12,699
Well, maybe just to
keep up appearances
in front of the family.
334
00:20:12,767 --> 00:20:14,231
You know,
peer pressure and all that.
335
00:20:14,300 --> 00:20:18,464
But from now on, Meg,
you and me
are secret best friends.
336
00:20:18,533 --> 00:20:21,599
Who wants a glass
of fresh lemonade?
Not me.
337
00:20:21,667 --> 00:20:24,431
What I want is a fresh glass
of better daughter.
338
00:20:24,500 --> 00:20:25,532
(GLASS SHATTERING)
339
00:20:25,601 --> 00:20:26,665
Hey.
340
00:20:37,934 --> 00:20:39,931
Stewie, do you really think
you can beat this guy?
341
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,899
Trust me, Brian, I've got
a few tricks up my sleeve.
342
00:20:52,233 --> 00:20:55,532
Oh, no, if only
I had rockets in my skis.
343
00:20:55,601 --> 00:20:58,265
Oh, wait, I totally
have rockets in my skis.
344
00:21:04,166 --> 00:21:07,332
And now I just sit back,
relax and watch my progress.
345
00:21:13,168 --> 00:21:15,932
Tea, sir?
Oh, thank you, Crone.
346
00:21:16,001 --> 00:21:18,099
You're so pleasant.
347
00:21:18,168 --> 00:21:21,298
Would you like to check
on the race, sir?
Yes, why not?
348
00:21:22,934 --> 00:21:24,599
(SCREAMING)
349
00:21:28,501 --> 00:21:29,966
(LAUGHING)
350
00:21:33,734 --> 00:21:35,665
Well, that's it,
I suppose.
351
00:21:35,734 --> 00:21:39,899
Listen, I'm really sorry,
Stewie. I know
how much Rupert meant to you.
352
00:21:39,968 --> 00:21:43,066
I don't know, Brian.
Maybe this is a sign
that you were right.
353
00:21:43,134 --> 00:21:46,365
Maybe I am getting
too old for Rupert.
354
00:21:46,434 --> 00:21:49,398
I guess I've just
got to let him go.
355
00:21:49,467 --> 00:21:52,198
Wow, that's very
grown-up of you, Stewie.
356
00:21:52,266 --> 00:21:56,431
Hey, dog, let's go.
My dad won you
fair and square.
357
00:21:56,500 --> 00:21:58,398
You're not really gonna
live with them, are you?
358
00:21:58,466 --> 00:21:59,731
No.
359
00:21:59,801 --> 00:22:01,631
You are not really
over Rupert, are you?
No.
360
00:22:01,700 --> 00:22:04,398
That's what I thought.
Oh, Crone.
361
00:22:06,134 --> 00:22:07,932
(SCREAMING)
362
00:22:09,234 --> 00:22:10,231
How are we gonna
get out of here?
363
00:22:10,300 --> 00:22:11,465
You still
got the starting gun?
364
00:22:11,534 --> 00:22:12,532
Yeah.
Give it to me.
365
00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:15,899
Get out of the fucking car!
366
00:22:15,968 --> 00:22:17,899
(SCREAMING)
Get out of the fucking car
right now, man!
367
00:22:17,968 --> 00:22:20,298
Get out of the fucking car!
Do it, do it!
Oh, my God.
368
00:22:20,367 --> 00:22:21,999
I'll do whatever you want!
I'll fucking kill you!
369
00:22:22,067 --> 00:22:24,598
Get out of the fucking car!
370
00:22:24,667 --> 00:22:25,999
BRIAN: Did we just
carjack someone?
371
00:22:26,067 --> 00:22:29,464
STEWIE: We sure did, Brian.
We sure did.