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♪ It seems today
that all you see ♪
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00:00:04,940 --> 00:00:08,243
♪ Is violence in movies
and sex on TV ♪
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00:00:08,294 --> 00:00:11,713
♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values ♪
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00:00:11,780 --> 00:00:14,666
♪ On which we used to rely? ♪
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♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪
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♪ Lucky there's a man
who positively can do ♪
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♪ All the things that make us ♪
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♪ Laugh and cry ♪
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♪ He's... a...
Fam... ily... Guy! ♪
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♪ Family Guy 10x16 ♪
Killer Queen
Original Air Date on March 11, 2012
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00:00:31,822 --> 00:00:35,322
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
12
00:00:36,138 --> 00:00:37,839
Good evening, Quahog.
I'm Tom Tucker.
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Our top story tonight:
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00:00:39,141 --> 00:00:40,608
In a shocking turn of events,
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00:00:40,676 --> 00:00:43,011
the city of Detroit
has officially given up.
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00:00:43,079 --> 00:00:45,680
The now former mayor has given
the key to the city
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00:00:45,748 --> 00:00:47,315
back to the Huron Indian tribe.
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00:00:47,383 --> 00:00:49,050
So, farewell, Detroit.
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00:00:49,118 --> 00:00:52,821
From Bob Seger to Axel Foley,
we never really cared. Joyce?
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00:00:52,888 --> 00:00:54,456
Thanks, Tom.
In local news,
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00:00:54,523 --> 00:00:57,125
Quahog is expecting
a special guest this weekend,
22
00:00:57,193 --> 00:00:58,860
famed Asian
competitive eating champion
23
00:00:58,928 --> 00:01:00,862
Charles Yamamoto.
24
00:01:00,930 --> 00:01:03,398
Yamamoto has not yet lost
a hot dog eating competition
25
00:01:03,466 --> 00:01:04,766
on his world tour.
26
00:01:04,834 --> 00:01:06,935
But if you think
you have what it takes
27
00:01:07,002 --> 00:01:08,803
to beat the best eater
in the world,
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00:01:08,871 --> 00:01:11,272
come down to the James Woods
High parking lot this Saturday
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00:01:11,340 --> 00:01:13,308
with $50 and a large appetite.
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00:01:13,375 --> 00:01:15,610
Wow, maybe you should
enter the contest, Dad.
31
00:01:15,678 --> 00:01:17,212
I'll bet
you could win.
32
00:01:17,279 --> 00:01:18,480
Well, I would, Chris,
33
00:01:18,547 --> 00:01:20,281
if I wasn't so
obsessed with my figure.
34
00:01:20,349 --> 00:01:21,599
Wait a minute.
35
00:01:21,667 --> 00:01:23,001
Chris, have you ever
eaten anything?
36
00:01:23,068 --> 00:01:24,686
Only, like, all the time!
37
00:01:24,753 --> 00:01:26,971
Perfect! Now we just
need the 50 bucks.
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00:01:27,039 --> 00:01:29,624
Damn it, I knew I shouldn't
have named that star for Mort.
39
00:01:29,691 --> 00:01:32,310
Ugh! Just give me the money.
40
00:01:32,378 --> 00:01:33,561
Peter, we're not
spending $50
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00:01:33,629 --> 00:01:35,513
so Chris can stuff his
face with hot dogs.
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00:01:39,101 --> 00:01:40,185
I'm a smart guy.
45
00:01:40,252 --> 00:01:41,753
Peter, no, you're not.
46
00:01:41,837 --> 00:01:44,656
Don't you feel ridiculous now?
47
00:01:47,927 --> 00:01:49,577
All right, Chris,
if we're gonna pay the entry fee
48
00:01:49,645 --> 00:01:50,812
for that eating contest,
49
00:01:50,879 --> 00:01:52,881
we got to sell some
of my old stuff.
50
00:01:52,948 --> 00:01:54,382
What are these, Dad?
Oh, wow.
51
00:01:54,433 --> 00:01:56,067
I haven't seen
those in a while.
52
00:01:56,152 --> 00:01:58,119
Those are my old Playboys
from the '70s.
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00:01:58,187 --> 00:02:00,255
Oh, my God, this one's so hot.
54
00:02:00,322 --> 00:02:02,657
You can almost see
a little bit of woman.
55
00:02:02,725 --> 00:02:05,977
Wow, Peter, you've got some
pretty cool albums here.
56
00:02:06,045 --> 00:02:09,247
Yeah, well, I was one
cool potato back in the day.
57
00:02:09,331 --> 00:02:11,416
You know, some of these might
actually be worth something.
58
00:02:11,483 --> 00:02:13,401
Look at this--
Beatles, Rolling Stones.
59
00:02:13,452 --> 00:02:15,887
Oh, my God, I haven't seen
this one in forever.
60
00:02:15,955 --> 00:02:17,839
Look-Look at this. Queen,
News of the World.
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00:02:17,906 --> 00:02:20,141
Check it out.
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00:02:20,209 --> 00:02:21,276
Aah!
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00:02:21,343 --> 00:02:22,544
Oh, what's the matter?
64
00:02:22,611 --> 00:02:24,712
What the hell is that?!
A killer robot monster?!
65
00:02:24,780 --> 00:02:26,147
No, it's News of the World.
66
00:02:26,215 --> 00:02:27,748
It's an album
by the band Queen. See?
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00:02:27,800 --> 00:02:29,434
Aah!
Stewie, relax.
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00:02:29,518 --> 00:02:31,753
No, Brian! You keep
that thing away from me!
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00:02:31,820 --> 00:02:33,922
Is it... Is it looking at me?!
70
00:02:33,989 --> 00:02:35,757
Can it see me?!
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00:02:35,824 --> 00:02:37,759
Man, you're really scared
of this thing, huh?
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00:02:37,826 --> 00:02:39,194
Does it eat little boys?!
73
00:02:39,261 --> 00:02:41,362
I don't know. Maybe,
if it's hungry.
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00:02:45,818 --> 00:02:48,236
Here's 50 bucks.
I'm taking this album.
75
00:02:48,287 --> 00:02:49,754
Oh, wow, check
it out, Chris!
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00:02:49,822 --> 00:02:51,890
We got our entry fee
for the eating contest!
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00:02:51,957 --> 00:02:53,408
Now for the
next five days,
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00:02:53,475 --> 00:02:55,026
we're gonna focus on
nothing but training.
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00:02:55,094 --> 00:02:56,928
We'll even get up at
the crack of dawn.
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00:03:00,699 --> 00:03:02,734
Dad?
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00:03:02,801 --> 00:03:05,270
Dad, it's time to get up.
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00:03:05,337 --> 00:03:08,723
Oh, jeez, Chris,
it's the crack of dawn.
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00:03:08,791 --> 00:03:11,059
Yeah, but Dad, you
said to wake you up.
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00:03:11,126 --> 00:03:12,760
Yeah... Yeah, but, uh...
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00:03:14,096 --> 00:03:15,346
Just... get-get...
get in...
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00:03:15,431 --> 00:03:17,615
get in the bed
with me and your mom.
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00:03:17,683 --> 00:03:19,417
Okay, but what
about training?
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00:03:19,485 --> 00:03:21,552
Oh, you smell
like melted cheese.
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00:03:21,620 --> 00:03:24,722
Yummy, yummy, yummy,
yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy.
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00:03:29,428 --> 00:03:31,896
Good morning, Rupert.
91
00:03:31,964 --> 00:03:35,266
Please tell me you set the timer
on the coffeemaker
92
00:03:35,334 --> 00:03:37,085
because I completely forgot.
93
00:03:39,955 --> 00:03:41,372
You son of a bitch!
94
00:03:41,457 --> 00:03:43,925
Good morning.
Thought I'd help you wake up.
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00:03:43,993 --> 00:03:45,994
God, why does he look sad?!
96
00:03:46,061 --> 00:03:47,428
He's already
destroyed mankind!
97
00:03:47,496 --> 00:03:49,063
What else could he want?!
98
00:03:51,100 --> 00:03:52,417
Hey, Carl.
99
00:03:52,484 --> 00:03:54,769
Hey, can I get a couple
of scratch-off lottery tickets?
100
00:03:54,837 --> 00:03:56,354
Oh, sure, Brian.
101
00:03:56,438 --> 00:03:58,773
Ooh, Brian, can I do one?
I love scratchers!
102
00:03:58,841 --> 00:04:00,258
Well, all right,
maybe just one.
103
00:04:01,510 --> 00:04:03,194
Cherry.
104
00:04:03,279 --> 00:04:04,379
Another cherry.
105
00:04:04,446 --> 00:04:06,731
Oh, come on, one more, one more!
106
00:04:09,902 --> 00:04:11,152
Thanks, Carl.
107
00:04:11,220 --> 00:04:12,487
Yeah, you're welcome.
That was fun.
108
00:04:12,554 --> 00:04:14,155
See you later.
109
00:04:14,223 --> 00:04:15,396
Hey, uh, thanks
for letting me be Yoda.
110
00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:16,621
Yup.
111
00:04:22,348 --> 00:04:23,915
What is this?
112
00:04:30,689 --> 00:04:34,225
("Pop Goes the Weasel" plays)
113
00:04:49,558 --> 00:04:52,243
Oh-ho-ho,
what was I worried about?
114
00:04:52,311 --> 00:04:54,061
Aah! Aah! Aah!
Oh, God!
115
00:04:54,113 --> 00:04:55,480
Aah! Aah!
116
00:04:55,547 --> 00:04:57,015
He's bleeding, man!
117
00:04:57,082 --> 00:04:59,567
He's bleeding, and nobody's
doing anything about it!
118
00:04:59,635 --> 00:05:01,803
I'll tell you what the news
of the world is.
119
00:05:01,870 --> 00:05:03,471
We're in a lot
of trouble!
120
00:05:07,643 --> 00:05:09,010
All right, Chris,
this is it.
121
00:05:09,078 --> 00:05:10,645
This is what we've
been working for.
122
00:05:10,713 --> 00:05:12,714
If you get nervous, just
picture the audience naked
123
00:05:12,781 --> 00:05:14,515
and slide those hot
dogs down your throat.
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00:05:14,583 --> 00:05:16,284
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome
125
00:05:16,352 --> 00:05:19,821
to the World Hot Dog Eating
Championship Competition!
126
00:05:19,888 --> 00:05:22,423
Please welcome our undefeated
champion eater,
127
00:05:22,491 --> 00:05:24,792
Charles Yamamoto!
128
00:05:29,314 --> 00:05:31,733
Oh, my God, that guy is huge.
129
00:05:32,935 --> 00:05:35,119
All right, eaters,
you have ten minutes.
130
00:05:35,187 --> 00:05:38,039
On your marks,
get set, eat!
131
00:05:57,626 --> 00:05:59,010
Come on, Chris.
You're doing great.
132
00:05:59,094 --> 00:06:00,778
Just keep going.
You're almost there.
133
00:06:00,846 --> 00:06:02,797
Well, I'd better get a move on.
134
00:06:08,604 --> 00:06:09,904
Time's almost up!
135
00:06:09,972 --> 00:06:11,472
It's gonna be a close one!
136
00:06:14,693 --> 00:06:15,910
Chris, you're four
hot dogs behind!
137
00:06:15,977 --> 00:06:17,078
Come on! Hurry!
138
00:06:17,145 --> 00:06:20,281
Oh! I can't eat anymore.
139
00:06:20,349 --> 00:06:22,250
Remember what I told you.
140
00:06:22,317 --> 00:06:25,953
I get these weird cyst things
right on the fringe of my sac.
141
00:06:26,021 --> 00:06:27,622
I want to get 'em checked,
142
00:06:27,689 --> 00:06:29,657
but I'm afraid
of what they're gonna tell me.
143
00:06:29,725 --> 00:06:31,659
He's right. I can do it!
144
00:06:40,385 --> 00:06:41,786
We have a winner!
145
00:06:41,854 --> 00:06:45,640
Ladies and gentlemen, Yamamoto
has finally been defeated!
146
00:06:48,127 --> 00:06:50,244
Chris, you did it.
You're a champion!
147
00:06:50,312 --> 00:06:52,246
And now you get your
pick of the groupies.
148
00:06:54,249 --> 00:06:55,550
They're shiny.
149
00:06:55,617 --> 00:06:56,984
Yeah, it's a
pretty warm day.
150
00:07:00,923 --> 00:07:02,540
Oh!
151
00:07:02,624 --> 00:07:03,825
Hey, hey, hey,
there, champ!
152
00:07:03,892 --> 00:07:05,226
Aw, look at
him, Lois.
153
00:07:05,294 --> 00:07:06,594
Relaxing after
his big victory.
154
00:07:06,662 --> 00:07:08,196
Peter, he's not relaxing.
155
00:07:08,263 --> 00:07:10,064
He's in a great deal of pain.
156
00:07:10,132 --> 00:07:12,467
Damn it, don't you
see what you did to him?
157
00:07:12,534 --> 00:07:15,069
I told you not to take him
to that eating competition,
158
00:07:15,137 --> 00:07:16,587
and you deliberately defied me!
159
00:07:16,655 --> 00:07:18,356
All right, what's
this really about?
160
00:07:18,423 --> 00:07:20,491
Peter, Chris is
already overweight.
161
00:07:20,559 --> 00:07:23,528
We need to start taking
responsibility for his health.
162
00:07:23,595 --> 00:07:25,963
So I decided to sign him up
for fat camp.
163
00:07:26,031 --> 00:07:28,900
What?! Mom, I don't want
to go to fat camp!
164
00:07:28,967 --> 00:07:31,335
I'm sorry, sweetie.
It's for your own good.
165
00:07:31,403 --> 00:07:34,305
And trust me, you'll feel
much better about yourself.
166
00:07:34,373 --> 00:07:36,891
Everyone's gonna
make fun of me!
167
00:07:36,959 --> 00:07:39,193
Oh, come on, who's
gonna make fun of you?
168
00:07:39,244 --> 00:07:41,279
Hey, fatty, I hear
you're going to fat camp.
169
00:07:41,346 --> 00:07:42,380
That's where
you belong!
170
00:07:42,447 --> 00:07:43,981
Peter, stop it!
171
00:07:44,049 --> 00:07:46,284
And I'd better not see
you at the big dance!
172
00:07:46,368 --> 00:07:47,585
Come on, you.
173
00:07:47,653 --> 00:07:49,887
Sorry, Chris.
I-I'm gonna go with him.
174
00:08:11,416 --> 00:08:13,533
Hi. Welcome to
Camp Fresh Start.
175
00:08:13,601 --> 00:08:15,535
Yeah, our son's gross,
so here we are.
176
00:08:15,603 --> 00:08:16,853
The name's
Griffin.
177
00:08:16,921 --> 00:08:18,088
Ah, yes,
Chris Griffin.
178
00:08:18,155 --> 00:08:20,274
We have you staying
in the Broccoli Cabin.
179
00:08:20,341 --> 00:08:22,442
So you guys are just
gonna leave me here?
180
00:08:22,510 --> 00:08:24,344
Yeah, honey.
That's what camp is.
181
00:08:24,412 --> 00:08:25,846
I don't want to stay!
182
00:08:25,914 --> 00:08:27,664
Please take me home!
183
00:08:27,732 --> 00:08:30,033
I don't want to go to fat camp!
184
00:08:30,101 --> 00:08:31,735
Aw, come on, Chris.
Your mother's right.
185
00:08:31,803 --> 00:08:33,170
This'll be good for you.
186
00:08:33,238 --> 00:08:35,038
Well, how come you
don't have to go?!
187
00:08:35,106 --> 00:08:36,540
You're fatter
than I am!
188
00:08:36,608 --> 00:08:38,041
Huh. Good question, Peter.
189
00:08:38,109 --> 00:08:39,843
How come
you don't have to go?
190
00:08:39,911 --> 00:08:41,044
What are you
talking about?
191
00:08:41,112 --> 00:08:42,679
Well, you're the one
who entered him
192
00:08:42,747 --> 00:08:44,081
in that hot dog
eating contest.
193
00:08:44,148 --> 00:08:45,449
Besides, he's right.
194
00:08:45,516 --> 00:08:47,618
You could stand to lose
a few pounds yourself.
195
00:08:47,685 --> 00:08:49,553
Unless you don't think
you could handle it.
196
00:08:49,621 --> 00:08:51,355
Oh, yeah?
197
00:08:51,422 --> 00:08:52,522
Well, I think I can.
198
00:08:52,590 --> 00:08:53,790
What was that?
199
00:08:53,858 --> 00:08:55,392
Never you mind
what that was.
200
00:08:59,063 --> 00:09:00,547
Rise and shine, everyone!
201
00:09:01,716 --> 00:09:02,916
What do you got there?
202
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:04,268
A candy bar, huh?
203
00:09:04,335 --> 00:09:05,569
Got any other
contraband?
204
00:09:05,637 --> 00:09:06,870
No.
Don't lie to me.
205
00:09:06,938 --> 00:09:08,438
My father was a lawyer.
206
00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:09,973
Oh, so your dad
gets guys off.
207
00:09:11,309 --> 00:09:12,342
Peter Griffin.
Cabin clown.
208
00:09:12,393 --> 00:09:14,011
Where's your bag, fatty?
209
00:09:14,078 --> 00:09:16,013
You're welcome to
search my "beef case."
210
00:09:16,080 --> 00:09:18,065
But there's
"mutton" in there.
211
00:09:18,132 --> 00:09:19,716
Peter Griffin.
Cabin clown.
212
00:09:19,784 --> 00:09:21,585
You're in big trouble, mister.
213
00:09:21,653 --> 00:09:24,354
Oh, there's no pulling the
wool over this guy's eyes.
214
00:09:24,422 --> 00:09:26,573
Looks like I'd better
go on the "lamb."
215
00:09:26,641 --> 00:09:28,425
Peter Griffin.
Cabin clown.
216
00:09:31,412 --> 00:09:34,197
I think I'm gonna do okay here
at fat camp.
217
00:09:34,265 --> 00:09:36,400
You sure you got
the "chops" for it?
218
00:09:36,467 --> 00:09:38,151
Knock it off.
I'm the cabin clown.
219
00:09:43,908 --> 00:09:45,842
And then he went
into the kitchen,
220
00:09:45,910 --> 00:09:49,596
slowly opened the refrigerator,
and it was empty!
221
00:09:50,581 --> 00:09:51,915
So then, the man,
222
00:09:51,966 --> 00:09:53,850
weak with hunger,
raced from the refrigerator
223
00:09:53,918 --> 00:09:56,520
to the counter
to look for a delivery menu,
224
00:09:56,587 --> 00:09:59,423
but all he could find was one
for a vegan place!
225
00:10:01,309 --> 00:10:03,026
Vegan places aren't
real, right?
226
00:10:03,094 --> 00:10:06,029
No, they're not real.
Or are they?!
227
00:10:06,097 --> 00:10:07,197
Aah! Salad!
228
00:10:09,500 --> 00:10:10,934
Thank you
for sharing, Leonard.
229
00:10:11,002 --> 00:10:13,436
And I think getting a new couch
was the way to go.
230
00:10:13,488 --> 00:10:15,305
Is there someone else
who has a story
231
00:10:15,373 --> 00:10:16,573
they'd like to share? Peter?
232
00:10:16,641 --> 00:10:17,841
Uh, yeah, sure.
233
00:10:17,909 --> 00:10:19,910
This one time,
I was on a city bus,
234
00:10:19,977 --> 00:10:21,445
and the guy next to me
235
00:10:21,512 --> 00:10:23,246
was eating a bucket
of fried chicken.
236
00:10:23,314 --> 00:10:24,981
- Mmm! - Ooh!
Yum!
237
00:10:25,049 --> 00:10:27,317
And the smell was
getting to me, you know.
238
00:10:27,385 --> 00:10:29,519
And even though
I didn't know the guy,
239
00:10:29,587 --> 00:10:31,221
I just dug in
240
00:10:31,289 --> 00:10:33,290
and started stuffing
that chicken into my mouth.
241
00:10:33,358 --> 00:10:34,424
O-Oh!
Embarrassing.
242
00:10:34,492 --> 00:10:35,692
I've done that.
243
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:37,094
It was so delicious.
244
00:10:37,161 --> 00:10:39,730
But... it wasn't
fried chicken.
245
00:10:39,797 --> 00:10:41,965
It was a baby!
246
00:10:42,033 --> 00:10:44,701
It was a baby.
247
00:10:50,808 --> 00:10:51,942
Stewie?
248
00:10:52,009 --> 00:10:54,811
Rupert, we won't give
that evil robot
249
00:10:54,879 --> 00:10:56,446
the satisfaction of killing us.
250
00:10:56,514 --> 00:10:59,199
We'll go together
on our own terms.
251
00:10:59,267 --> 00:11:01,284
See you on the other side.
252
00:11:02,353 --> 00:11:03,253
Oh, my God!
253
00:11:03,321 --> 00:11:04,671
Stewie, no!
254
00:11:04,739 --> 00:11:06,073
What the hell's
wrong with you?!
255
00:11:06,140 --> 00:11:07,507
It's that robot!
256
00:11:07,575 --> 00:11:09,776
He killed Queen,
and now he's going to kill me!
257
00:11:09,844 --> 00:11:11,078
He didn't kill Queen.
258
00:11:11,145 --> 00:11:12,212
They're all fine.
259
00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:14,064
Most of them are fine.
260
00:11:14,132 --> 00:11:16,083
Look, Stewie, I'm sorry
for scaring you, all right?
261
00:11:16,150 --> 00:11:18,218
But come on,
it's not a real robot.
262
00:11:18,302 --> 00:11:20,336
See? It, It's
just an album. Look.
263
00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:22,289
Here, you want
to hit it?
264
00:11:22,356 --> 00:11:24,958
Well... I'm usually more
comfortable around things
265
00:11:25,026 --> 00:11:26,993
if I can put them
in my mouth.
266
00:11:27,061 --> 00:11:28,845
So, can I put it
in my mouth?
267
00:11:28,896 --> 00:11:29,963
I guess.
268
00:11:31,532 --> 00:11:33,033
This is just an album!
269
00:11:33,101 --> 00:11:35,552
Yeah, that's what I've
been trying to tell you.
270
00:11:35,620 --> 00:11:37,421
So, you know,
can you forgive me?
271
00:11:37,488 --> 00:11:39,873
Oh, I suppose so.
272
00:11:39,941 --> 00:11:41,808
I mean, Magellan forgave
the "Land Ho" prankster.
273
00:11:41,876 --> 00:11:43,110
Land ho!
274
00:11:43,177 --> 00:11:44,361
Where?! Where?!
275
00:11:44,429 --> 00:11:45,762
Psych! Made you
look, loser.
276
00:11:45,830 --> 00:11:47,097
Good thing
there wasn't land
277
00:11:47,165 --> 00:11:49,065
or else you'd have
to meet the natives
278
00:11:49,133 --> 00:11:50,767
with that mustard stain on your shirt.
What stain?
279
00:11:50,835 --> 00:11:51,968
Ah!
280
00:11:52,036 --> 00:11:54,337
Ugh! Why did I even bring
you on this trip?!
281
00:11:54,405 --> 00:11:55,739
Because I'm the best
damn land spotter
282
00:11:55,807 --> 00:11:56,940
in all of Europe.
283
00:11:57,008 --> 00:11:58,475
It's true.
You are the best.
284
00:11:58,543 --> 00:12:00,444
Yeah, I don't need you
to tell me that.
285
00:12:04,415 --> 00:12:06,349
Dad, I can't take
this anymore.
286
00:12:06,417 --> 00:12:10,387
I'm so tired
and I'm so hungry.
287
00:12:10,455 --> 00:12:12,239
I got an idea, Chris.
Follow me.
288
00:12:13,741 --> 00:12:14,891
What are we doing?
289
00:12:14,942 --> 00:12:17,360
I saw a forest like this
in a book one time,
290
00:12:17,411 --> 00:12:19,629
and I know there's a gingerbread
house out here somewhere.
291
00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:21,031
Do you think
we could find it?!
292
00:12:21,098 --> 00:12:22,983
We have to, Chris.
We-we gotta eat something
293
00:12:23,050 --> 00:12:24,284
besides what
they're feeding us.
294
00:12:24,352 --> 00:12:26,019
I know what
you mean, Dad.
295
00:12:26,087 --> 00:12:28,688
I'm so hungry I could
eat this dead camper.
296
00:12:28,756 --> 00:12:29,990
Holy crap!
297
00:12:35,897 --> 00:12:38,465
Well, we clearly don't have
all the evidence yet,
298
00:12:38,533 --> 00:12:40,600
but that's never
stopped us before, right?
299
00:12:44,155 --> 00:12:46,022
Oh, there's no other cops here.
300
00:12:46,090 --> 00:12:49,025
But we do know one thing,
this kid was murdered.
301
00:12:50,261 --> 00:12:51,528
Murdered?!
Who in the world
302
00:12:51,596 --> 00:12:52,762
would want to
kill a camper?
303
00:12:52,830 --> 00:12:54,364
Don't look at me.
304
00:12:54,432 --> 00:12:55,949
I'm just here to
drop off my son.
305
00:12:56,033 --> 00:13:00,453
Justin? Justin,
that does not work for me.
306
00:13:00,521 --> 00:13:02,289
And it looks like there
are signs of trauma
307
00:13:02,356 --> 00:13:03,790
around the throat.
308
00:13:03,858 --> 00:13:05,759
Somebody strangled
this fat kid.
309
00:13:05,826 --> 00:13:07,160
Wait. He was strangled?
310
00:13:07,228 --> 00:13:08,228
Yeah.
311
00:13:08,296 --> 00:13:09,629
Joe, I know
who did it.
312
00:13:09,697 --> 00:13:11,164
You do? Who?
313
00:13:11,232 --> 00:13:12,916
Well, there's
only one person I know
314
00:13:12,967 --> 00:13:14,634
who likes to strangle fat guys:
315
00:13:14,719 --> 00:13:16,453
Patrick Pewterschmidt.
316
00:13:16,521 --> 00:13:17,254
Who's that?
317
00:13:17,321 --> 00:13:19,556
My brother-in-law.
318
00:13:19,623 --> 00:13:22,809
People call him
"The Fat Guy Strangler."
319
00:13:22,894 --> 00:13:26,296
He's always had a thing
for strangling fat guys.
320
00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:28,832
I guess he fits
the profile, Peter,
321
00:13:28,900 --> 00:13:31,101
but Lois's brother is
locked up in an asylum.
322
00:13:31,168 --> 00:13:33,303
Well, either way,
we gotta get out of here.
323
00:13:33,371 --> 00:13:34,738
Otherwise,
we're just sitting ducks!
324
00:13:34,805 --> 00:13:37,574
Hey, we all know this guy
goes for the classy ladies.
325
00:13:37,642 --> 00:13:39,175
In fact, I once
caught him trying
326
00:13:39,243 --> 00:13:40,443
to pick up
a quack whore.
327
00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:44,014
All right, calm down.
328
00:13:44,081 --> 00:13:46,016
We all make bad choices.
329
00:13:49,287 --> 00:13:50,253
Hello?
330
00:13:50,321 --> 00:13:51,555
Lois, I hope
you're sitting down.
331
00:13:51,622 --> 00:13:52,756
I got something
to tell ya.
332
00:13:52,823 --> 00:13:54,157
Oh, God, what's wrong?
333
00:13:54,225 --> 00:13:56,076
Is everything okay?
Is it Chris?
334
00:13:56,143 --> 00:13:57,544
No, it's Peter,
your husband.
335
00:13:57,612 --> 00:13:59,179
But I'm calling
with big news.
336
00:13:59,247 --> 00:14:00,880
I was Anita in
the camp production
337
00:14:00,948 --> 00:14:02,315
of West Side Story.
338
00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:04,784
Peter, you know you're terrible
at patter songs.
339
00:14:04,852 --> 00:14:06,453
I did okay.
340
00:14:06,520 --> 00:14:08,838
♪ ...America ♪
341
00:14:08,889 --> 00:14:10,473
♪ ...America ♪
342
00:14:10,541 --> 00:14:11,674
♪ ...America ♪
343
00:14:11,726 --> 00:14:15,095
♪ ...America. ♪
344
00:14:15,162 --> 00:14:16,396
I got other news, too.
345
00:14:16,464 --> 00:14:18,632
One of the fat kids at camp
got strangled!
346
00:14:18,699 --> 00:14:20,267
Oh, my God!
347
00:14:20,334 --> 00:14:22,135
Yeah, but don't worry.
It ain't your brother.
348
00:14:22,203 --> 00:14:23,570
He's still locked up
in that asylum.
349
00:14:23,638 --> 00:14:26,006
Um, Mom...
350
00:14:26,073 --> 00:14:27,841
look who dropped
by for a visit.
351
00:14:29,210 --> 00:14:31,111
Hello, Lois.
352
00:14:31,178 --> 00:14:32,512
Patrick!
353
00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:33,780
It's been
a long time.
354
00:14:33,848 --> 00:14:36,132
Peter, he's here!
355
00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:38,134
Wait a second, Lois,
I want to go back
356
00:14:38,202 --> 00:14:40,003
to what you said
about my patter singing.
357
00:14:40,071 --> 00:14:41,304
Who gives you
the right?!
358
00:14:41,372 --> 00:14:42,706
You know I carried
Pirates of Penzance
359
00:14:42,773 --> 00:14:45,275
that season at Quahog
Community Theater.
360
00:14:45,343 --> 00:14:48,511
♪ I am the
...general ♪
361
00:14:48,579 --> 00:14:51,014
♪ ...mineral ♪
362
00:14:51,082 --> 00:14:53,450
♪ ...historical ♪
363
00:14:53,517 --> 00:14:55,518
♪ ...with the eggs on top. ♪
364
00:15:01,702 --> 00:15:03,652
Man, I hope we get back
to your house
365
00:15:03,704 --> 00:15:05,621
before Patrick hurts
anyone else!
366
00:15:05,672 --> 00:15:07,707
If he even lays
a finger on my family,
367
00:15:07,791 --> 00:15:09,875
I'll do to him
what I did to the Riddler.
368
00:15:21,471 --> 00:15:23,072
Freeze, psycho!
369
00:15:23,140 --> 00:15:24,607
Oh, Peter, thank God!
370
00:15:24,675 --> 00:15:26,442
Patrick Pewterschmidt,
you're under arrest
371
00:15:26,510 --> 00:15:29,445
for the murder of, uh...
372
00:15:29,513 --> 00:15:31,547
I didn't get
the kid's name.
373
00:15:31,615 --> 00:15:33,049
We're supposed to do that.
374
00:15:33,116 --> 00:15:34,567
Lois, you called
the cops?
375
00:15:34,634 --> 00:15:38,371
Patrick, you're my brother and
I love you, but you're not well.
376
00:15:38,438 --> 00:15:39,622
But I'm better now.
377
00:15:39,689 --> 00:15:40,890
I've put my past
behind me.
378
00:15:40,957 --> 00:15:42,224
Save it, Patrick.
379
00:15:42,292 --> 00:15:45,027
We know you escaped
from the asylum and killed...
380
00:15:45,095 --> 00:15:46,896
Bill, we'll just call him
"Bill" for now.
381
00:15:46,963 --> 00:15:48,564
Escaped?
I-I didn't escape.
382
00:15:48,632 --> 00:15:51,200
Just this morning, a very nice
gentleman opened my cell door
383
00:15:51,268 --> 00:15:52,968
and said I was
free to go.
384
00:15:53,036 --> 00:15:55,338
Yeah, nice try.
That's not how it works.
385
00:15:55,405 --> 00:15:58,441
Uncle Patrick, why do you
strangle fat people?
386
00:15:58,508 --> 00:15:59,809
It's probably
a weird fetish thing.
387
00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:01,377
Some criminals have 'em.
388
00:16:01,445 --> 00:16:03,112
Like those anal-retentive
bandits
389
00:16:03,180 --> 00:16:04,780
who robbed Quahog Bank
last year.
390
00:16:04,848 --> 00:16:07,283
All right, hands in the air!
Vertically!
391
00:16:07,351 --> 00:16:09,185
Both arms should be
parallel to each other!
392
00:16:09,236 --> 00:16:11,737
You, fill this bag with clean,
unmarked bills!
393
00:16:11,822 --> 00:16:14,724
But first fix that notepad
so it's at a right angle
394
00:16:14,791 --> 00:16:16,192
with the corner of your desk!
395
00:16:16,259 --> 00:16:18,411
And tap that pile of receipts
against a flat surface
396
00:16:18,495 --> 00:16:19,862
so they're not sticking out
haphazardly!
397
00:16:19,930 --> 00:16:21,230
You know what?!
Forget about the money!
398
00:16:21,281 --> 00:16:22,365
Everybody grab a broom!
399
00:16:22,432 --> 00:16:23,566
We are straightening
this place up!
400
00:16:27,054 --> 00:16:28,220
All right, campers,
401
00:16:28,288 --> 00:16:29,889
until the Fat Guy Strangler
is caught,
402
00:16:29,956 --> 00:16:32,291
everyone has to stay
inside their cabins.
403
00:16:32,359 --> 00:16:33,893
Now I'm gonna do
a stomach count.
404
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:35,661
When I call your name,
please respond.
405
00:16:35,729 --> 00:16:36,695
Jenkins?
406
00:16:37,731 --> 00:16:38,697
Robertson?
407
00:16:39,733 --> 00:16:40,733
Davis?
408
00:16:40,801 --> 00:16:42,568
Elliot?
409
00:16:42,636 --> 00:16:43,469
Where's Elliot?
410
00:16:43,537 --> 00:16:44,937
I think he's asleep.
411
00:16:45,005 --> 00:16:47,473
Elliot?
Elliot, wake up.
412
00:16:47,541 --> 00:16:49,959
Elliot?
413
00:16:51,528 --> 00:16:52,862
Officer Swanson here.
414
00:16:52,929 --> 00:16:54,764
What?! Oh, my God!
415
00:16:54,831 --> 00:16:56,499
What is it, Joe?
416
00:16:56,566 --> 00:16:58,601
Another camper was strangled
half an hour ago.
417
00:16:58,668 --> 00:17:00,870
But... that means...
418
00:17:00,937 --> 00:17:03,038
Patrick can't be
the killer.
419
00:17:03,106 --> 00:17:05,007
That's what I was
trying to tell you.
420
00:17:05,075 --> 00:17:06,642
Acknowledged. I'm on it.
421
00:17:06,710 --> 00:17:08,411
Joe, would you settle
a camp argument?
422
00:17:08,478 --> 00:17:10,379
Is it "Bombardment"
or "Dodgeball"?
423
00:17:10,447 --> 00:17:11,147
Dodgeball.
424
00:17:11,214 --> 00:17:12,248
Ah, you don't know.
425
00:17:12,315 --> 00:17:13,949
Well, I'd better
put out an APB
426
00:17:14,017 --> 00:17:15,484
to all
the neighboring towns.
427
00:17:15,552 --> 00:17:17,353
Oh, the murderer won't leave
the camp.
428
00:17:17,421 --> 00:17:19,321
What?
What are you talking about?
429
00:17:19,389 --> 00:17:20,756
He's "feeding."
430
00:17:20,807 --> 00:17:22,892
He killed twice and
he's gonna do it again.
431
00:17:22,959 --> 00:17:25,511
He's got plenty of places
to hide out there
432
00:17:25,595 --> 00:17:27,062
and a fully stocked corral
of victims.
433
00:17:27,130 --> 00:17:28,514
How do you know that?
434
00:17:28,582 --> 00:17:30,399
Trust me. I know.
435
00:17:30,467 --> 00:17:32,585
You know, Joe, maybe Patrick can
actually be of help.
436
00:17:32,652 --> 00:17:35,037
I mean, who better to get
inside the mind of someone
437
00:17:35,105 --> 00:17:37,373
who's strangling fat people
than someone who's done it himself?
438
00:17:37,441 --> 00:17:38,707
Yeah, give him a chance, Joe.
439
00:17:38,775 --> 00:17:40,543
Like I did with scary teenagers.
440
00:17:40,610 --> 00:17:42,878
I used to be afraid of 'em,
until I realized
441
00:17:42,946 --> 00:17:44,213
they were just misunderstood.
442
00:17:44,281 --> 00:17:46,115
Hey, fat ass,
give me your wallet!
443
00:17:46,183 --> 00:17:47,416
I could give you
my wallet,
444
00:17:47,484 --> 00:17:49,852
but what I think
you really want...
445
00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:51,187
is love.
446
00:17:51,254 --> 00:17:52,855
It's true!
447
00:17:58,245 --> 00:17:59,478
I'm taking your shoes.
448
00:18:06,319 --> 00:18:07,536
Poor kid.
449
00:18:07,604 --> 00:18:08,938
You know,
the weirdest thing is
450
00:18:09,005 --> 00:18:10,556
his bunk is right next
to Chris's.
451
00:18:10,624 --> 00:18:11,957
Yeah, that was
a close call.
452
00:18:12,025 --> 00:18:13,993
Oh, it was more
than a close call.
453
00:18:14,060 --> 00:18:16,662
You said the first victim was
wearing a baseball cap,
454
00:18:16,730 --> 00:18:18,197
this second one is blond...
455
00:18:18,265 --> 00:18:20,399
The killer wasn't trying
to murder this kid.
456
00:18:20,484 --> 00:18:22,401
He was trying to murder Chris.
457
00:18:22,469 --> 00:18:23,936
Oh, my God!
458
00:18:24,004 --> 00:18:26,188
W-Why would anyone
want to kill Chris?
459
00:18:26,256 --> 00:18:27,640
I don't know,
but I do know
460
00:18:27,707 --> 00:18:29,842
that he's in a great deal
of danger right now.
461
00:18:29,910 --> 00:18:31,393
Come on. Let's go!
Yeah!
462
00:18:31,461 --> 00:18:34,230
But wait, this is our last
chance to do a panty raid!
463
00:18:35,632 --> 00:18:37,249
Yay! Fat camp!
We got it!
464
00:18:37,334 --> 00:18:39,201
Oh, no, a gust of wind!
465
00:18:55,936 --> 00:18:58,687
Wha, what
are you doing here?
466
00:18:58,755 --> 00:19:00,589
You dishonored me,
Chris Griffin.
467
00:19:00,657 --> 00:19:03,242
No one has ever eaten
more hot dogs than me.
468
00:19:03,310 --> 00:19:05,060
Now you must die!
469
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:34,756
Hey, fat ass!
470
00:19:36,226 --> 00:19:37,826
I got news for you.
471
00:19:37,894 --> 00:19:40,996
The News of the World!
472
00:19:42,299 --> 00:19:44,233
Why does robot hold
dead people?!
473
00:19:44,301 --> 00:19:45,951
Is that future or past?!
474
00:19:51,591 --> 00:19:54,877
Oh, my God, Stewie,
you saved my life!
475
00:19:54,944 --> 00:19:56,862
Ah, you would've done
the same for me, Chris.
476
00:19:56,930 --> 00:19:59,198
The important thing is,
we're all gonna be okay.
477
00:19:59,266 --> 00:20:00,549
Right, Giant Robot?
478
00:20:10,860 --> 00:20:14,863
Charles Yamamoto...
went from eating champion
479
00:20:14,931 --> 00:20:16,265
to cold-blooded killer.
480
00:20:16,333 --> 00:20:17,499
Who'd have thought?
481
00:20:17,567 --> 00:20:19,401
Wait a minute, Joe.
That's the guy who opened
482
00:20:19,469 --> 00:20:21,303
the door to my cell
yesterday and told me
483
00:20:21,371 --> 00:20:22,438
I could leave
the asylum.
484
00:20:22,505 --> 00:20:24,106
Huh. Is that right?
485
00:20:24,174 --> 00:20:25,674
Well, then it
all makes sense.
486
00:20:25,742 --> 00:20:26,942
Yamamoto wanted it
to look like
487
00:20:27,010 --> 00:20:28,911
you broke out
on your own.
488
00:20:28,979 --> 00:20:30,346
That way,
when he murdered Chris,
489
00:20:30,413 --> 00:20:33,115
it was a cinch that you would
take the blame.
490
00:20:33,183 --> 00:20:37,052
Well, Patrick, I guess
we all owe you an apology.
491
00:20:37,120 --> 00:20:38,087
Patrick?
492
00:20:38,154 --> 00:20:40,022
Where did he go?
493
00:20:40,090 --> 00:20:41,390
He was just
right here.
494
00:20:41,458 --> 00:20:42,424
What happened?!
495
00:20:44,077 --> 00:20:45,661
Damn it!
He must've gotten away!
496
00:20:45,729 --> 00:20:46,929
How is that possible?!
497
00:20:46,997 --> 00:20:48,797
I don't know,
but I'd better make it
498
00:20:48,865 --> 00:20:50,399
look like there
was a struggle.
499
00:20:50,467 --> 00:20:51,667
Someone punch me
in the face.
500
00:20:52,919 --> 00:20:54,453
I'm a good friend
to you.
501
00:20:54,478 --> 00:20:58,478
== sync, corrected by elderman ==