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00:00:00,675 --> 00:00:04,043
♪ It seems today
that all you see ♪
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00:00:04,098 --> 00:00:07,417
♪ Is violence in movies
and sex on TV ♪
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00:00:07,468 --> 00:00:10,887
♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values ♪
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00:00:11,055 --> 00:00:13,957
♪ On which we used to rely? ♪
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♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪
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♪ Lucky there's a man
who positively can do ♪
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♪ All the things that make us ♪
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♪ Laugh and cry ♪
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♪ He's... a...
Fam... ily... Guy! ♪
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00:00:26,678 --> 00:00:30,178
♪ Family Guy 10x20 ♪
Leggo My Meg-O
Original Air Date on May 6, 2012
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00:00:30,179 --> 00:00:33,679
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
12
00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:34,917
All right, ladies,
13
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let's pick teams
for dodgeball.
14
00:00:36,803 --> 00:00:37,737
Connie, would you like
to be a captain?
15
00:00:37,804 --> 00:00:38,838
Sure.
16
00:00:38,906 --> 00:00:40,840
I pick everyone
except Meg.
17
00:00:40,908 --> 00:00:42,541
Fair enough. Go!
18
00:00:45,212 --> 00:00:47,313
Oww!
19
00:00:57,357 --> 00:00:59,125
Hey, where's
everybody going?
20
00:00:59,192 --> 00:01:01,127
That's not how we end
this class.
21
00:01:02,774 --> 00:01:03,837
Good job today.
22
00:01:03,862 --> 00:01:05,071
Good job today.
23
00:01:05,096 --> 00:01:06,397
Great class.
24
00:01:06,422 --> 00:01:07,481
Nice hustle.
25
00:01:11,255 --> 00:01:12,642
Hey, how was gym class?
26
00:01:12,643 --> 00:01:13,432
Terrible.
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00:01:13,433 --> 00:01:14,466
You know, I don't think
I can take
28
00:01:14,534 --> 00:01:15,517
another semester
at this school, Ruth.
29
00:01:15,585 --> 00:01:17,019
It's torture.
30
00:01:17,086 --> 00:01:19,788
It's worse than sitting
next to a baby on an airplane.
31
00:01:21,191 --> 00:01:22,658
So what brings you
to Kentucky?
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00:01:22,725 --> 00:01:23,892
I'm visiting my family.
33
00:01:23,960 --> 00:01:25,527
Ah, family man.
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00:01:25,595 --> 00:01:27,996
Me? Single
and ready to mingle.
35
00:01:28,064 --> 00:01:30,866
Tom Brunell's the name.
Insurance is the game.
36
00:01:30,934 --> 00:01:34,636
And right now,
the game is very good to me.
37
00:01:34,704 --> 00:01:35,854
Hey, I know!
38
00:01:35,922 --> 00:01:36,955
If you hate it
so much here,
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00:01:37,023 --> 00:01:38,056
why don't you
come to Paris
40
00:01:38,124 --> 00:01:39,441
for a semester
with me instead?
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00:01:39,509 --> 00:01:40,626
I'm leaving next week.
44
00:01:44,564 --> 00:01:46,164
My aunt even has
an apartment there
45
00:01:46,232 --> 00:01:47,666
that we can stay in
for free.
46
00:01:47,734 --> 00:01:50,135
Oh, my God,
that sounds so amazing!
47
00:01:50,203 --> 00:01:51,653
Excuse me,
I was wondering
48
00:01:51,721 --> 00:01:54,223
if you would go to the dance
with me on Friday.
49
00:01:54,307 --> 00:01:55,774
Chris, it's me, Meg.
50
00:01:56,676 --> 00:01:57,809
Well, that's everybody.
51
00:02:02,415 --> 00:02:05,550
We now return
to Ethiopian Hoarders.
52
00:02:05,618 --> 00:02:08,754
I don't know
how it got like this!
53
00:02:08,821 --> 00:02:10,322
Dad, Mom,
54
00:02:10,390 --> 00:02:11,757
there's something
I want to ask you.
55
00:02:11,824 --> 00:02:12,991
Can I go to school
in Paris
56
00:02:13,059 --> 00:02:13,992
for a semester?
57
00:02:14,060 --> 00:02:15,427
What? Paris?
58
00:02:15,495 --> 00:02:17,229
Hey, you know,
I have a pen pal in Paris.
59
00:02:17,297 --> 00:02:18,680
Would you mind bringing him
this letter?
60
00:02:20,700 --> 00:02:21,984
We're fighting.
61
00:02:22,051 --> 00:02:24,503
Meg, I'd love to send you
to Paris for a semester,
62
00:02:24,570 --> 00:02:25,921
but we can't afford that.
63
00:02:26,005 --> 00:02:27,189
But I can pay
for it myself.
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00:02:27,257 --> 00:02:28,957
I've been saving up
from all my part-time jobs.
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00:02:29,025 --> 00:02:30,359
That's smart of you, Meg.
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00:02:30,426 --> 00:02:31,560
You know, sometimes I do
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00:02:31,628 --> 00:02:33,729
part-time jobs
for extra cash.
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00:02:35,231 --> 00:02:36,748
Gimme money. Gimme money.
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00:02:36,799 --> 00:02:38,799
Gimme money. Gimme money.
Gimme money.
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00:02:45,358 --> 00:02:46,858
You be careful,
sweetie,
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00:02:46,926 --> 00:02:48,560
and call us as soon
as the plane lands.
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00:02:48,611 --> 00:02:49,911
Okay, Mom, I will.
73
00:02:49,979 --> 00:02:51,313
I'll miss you, Dad.
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00:02:51,381 --> 00:02:53,482
I've never been very good
at saying good-bee.
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00:02:53,566 --> 00:02:55,267
Good-bee, Meg.
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00:02:55,335 --> 00:02:56,601
And I'm gonna
bring you back
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00:02:56,669 --> 00:02:58,387
something special,
little guy.
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00:02:58,454 --> 00:03:00,689
Don't worry about me.
Just get yourself laid.
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00:03:00,757 --> 00:03:02,991
Will you get me
French Stewart's autograph?
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00:03:03,059 --> 00:03:04,626
Say hello
to the Pont Neuf for me,
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00:03:04,694 --> 00:03:06,862
or as I like to call it,
my inspiration point...
82
00:03:06,929 --> 00:03:07,929
Oh, you're gone.
83
00:03:07,997 --> 00:03:09,331
And the family's gone.
84
00:03:16,856 --> 00:03:19,341
Oh, my God, we're
actually here in Paris.
85
00:03:19,425 --> 00:03:21,860
This is so exciting!
86
00:03:21,928 --> 00:03:23,328
Good day, foreigners.
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00:03:23,396 --> 00:03:26,298
On behalf of the country
of France, we surrender.
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00:03:26,366 --> 00:03:28,600
Oh, my God,
I love your breath.
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00:03:28,668 --> 00:03:29,701
Hi, I'm Meg.
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00:03:29,769 --> 00:03:32,120
This is my friend, Ruth.
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00:03:32,188 --> 00:03:34,099
Would you ladies
like to share a cab,
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00:03:34,167 --> 00:03:36,885
Or as we say,
"sharre a cabbuh"?
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00:03:36,953 --> 00:03:37,886
Sure.
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00:03:37,954 --> 00:03:39,154
That sounds great.
95
00:03:39,222 --> 00:03:41,089
Oh, and please
do not be suspicious
96
00:03:41,157 --> 00:03:42,591
that I am
at the airport
97
00:03:42,658 --> 00:03:44,393
with no baggage
whatsoever.
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00:03:46,345 --> 00:03:49,464
A cool name to say
with a French accent
99
00:03:49,532 --> 00:03:51,433
is Ashtahn Kootchere.
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00:03:54,654 --> 00:03:55,420
Bye!
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00:03:55,488 --> 00:03:56,471
Thanks!
102
00:03:59,892 --> 00:04:01,126
Hey, it's me.
103
00:04:01,194 --> 00:04:02,861
I've got
some fresh arrivals for you.
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00:04:02,929 --> 00:04:04,529
How are they?
105
00:04:04,597 --> 00:04:06,098
On a scale from un to dix,
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00:04:06,165 --> 00:04:09,000
they're about a trois.
107
00:04:10,286 --> 00:04:12,154
Wow, this place
is awesome!
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00:04:12,221 --> 00:04:13,522
I know!
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00:04:13,589 --> 00:04:15,624
Hey, you wanna dance around
like morons to loud music?
110
00:04:16,843 --> 00:04:18,159
I'll be right back.
111
00:04:18,211 --> 00:04:20,479
I've been holding in
a dump since America.
112
00:04:25,151 --> 00:04:26,902
Griffin residence.
113
00:04:26,969 --> 00:04:28,169
Hi, Dad, it's me.
114
00:04:28,221 --> 00:04:30,138
Just wanted you to know
I got here safe.
115
00:04:30,206 --> 00:04:30,906
And sound?
116
00:04:30,973 --> 00:04:32,908
Yes, Dad, and sound.
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00:04:32,975 --> 00:04:34,042
Oh, good.
118
00:04:34,110 --> 00:04:36,094
The "sound" is what concerns me.
119
00:04:36,162 --> 00:04:37,996
Oh, it's so amazing here, Dad.
Yep.
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00:04:38,064 --> 00:04:39,598
You should see it.
Uh-huh.
121
00:04:39,665 --> 00:04:41,199
The apartment we're staying in is huge,
Uh-huh.
122
00:04:41,267 --> 00:04:42,567
and has an incredible view of...
Uh-huh.
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00:04:43,703 --> 00:04:44,903
Dad, something's
going on.
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00:04:44,971 --> 00:04:46,104
Some men just broke in.
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00:04:48,908 --> 00:04:50,542
Oh, my God!
They've got Ruth!
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00:04:52,011 --> 00:04:54,362
And now, I think
they're coming after me!
127
00:04:54,430 --> 00:04:55,597
All right, Meg,
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00:04:55,665 --> 00:04:57,699
I need you to listen to me
very carefully:
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00:04:57,767 --> 00:04:58,800
panic.
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00:04:58,868 --> 00:05:00,235
Pay no attention to detail.
131
00:05:00,303 --> 00:05:02,003
Let your mind race.
132
00:05:02,071 --> 00:05:03,805
Take short, rapid breaths.
133
00:05:03,873 --> 00:05:05,474
Then hide under the bed,
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00:05:05,541 --> 00:05:07,375
but leave two of your feet
sticking out.
135
00:05:13,783 --> 00:05:14,799
Oh, my God, Dad!
136
00:05:14,867 --> 00:05:16,818
Are they gonna take me?
I'm so scared!
137
00:05:18,254 --> 00:05:19,721
Meg? Meg?
138
00:05:24,360 --> 00:05:27,395
I don't know who you are.
I don't know what you want.
139
00:05:27,446 --> 00:05:30,398
But I have a very particular
lack of skills.
140
00:05:30,449 --> 00:05:32,784
I will never be able
to find you,
141
00:05:32,869 --> 00:05:34,736
but what I do have
is two dollars
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00:05:34,787 --> 00:05:36,338
and a Casio wristwatch.
143
00:05:36,405 --> 00:05:38,223
You can have one of them.
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00:05:38,291 --> 00:05:40,625
Drakkar Noir.
145
00:05:42,061 --> 00:05:43,461
These guys are serious.
146
00:05:43,529 --> 00:05:45,197
Lois, Meg's dead!
147
00:05:48,501 --> 00:05:51,069
Please, there's gotta be
something you can do!
148
00:05:51,137 --> 00:05:53,338
My little girl is
in terrible danger!
149
00:05:53,406 --> 00:05:54,873
Ma'am, the men
who took your daughter
150
00:05:54,941 --> 00:05:56,141
are most likely members
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00:05:56,209 --> 00:05:58,109
of a sophisticated network
of human smugglers.
152
00:05:58,177 --> 00:06:00,078
If she's not found
within 96 hours,
153
00:06:00,146 --> 00:06:02,280
chances are
she's gone forever.
154
00:06:02,348 --> 00:06:03,715
Then we've gotta hurry!
155
00:06:03,783 --> 00:06:05,250
Sorry, we can't
begin our search
156
00:06:05,318 --> 00:06:07,452
until she's been missing
for 96 hours.
157
00:06:07,520 --> 00:06:09,621
Oh, my God! My baby!
158
00:06:09,689 --> 00:06:11,690
Yeah, there's a pretty grisly
sex trade over there.
159
00:06:11,757 --> 00:06:14,526
Usually we just end up
burying framed pictures.
160
00:06:14,594 --> 00:06:16,461
Oh, Peter!
This is a nightmare!
161
00:06:20,249 --> 00:06:21,666
What's going on
down there?
162
00:06:21,734 --> 00:06:22,701
Are they gonna
find her?
163
00:06:22,768 --> 00:06:23,835
Doesn't look good.
164
00:06:23,903 --> 00:06:25,770
Stewie, I think
there's only one way
165
00:06:25,838 --> 00:06:27,405
we're ever gonna
see Meg again.
166
00:06:27,473 --> 00:06:29,574
You and I have to take matters
into our own hands.
167
00:06:29,642 --> 00:06:31,176
What? What are you
talking about?
168
00:06:31,244 --> 00:06:32,794
Look, you're the only one
who's got the know-how
169
00:06:32,862 --> 00:06:34,779
and the technology
to help us track her down.
170
00:06:34,847 --> 00:06:36,297
Hmm. Interesting.
171
00:06:36,349 --> 00:06:38,316
Last week, all my gadgets
were "hooey,"
172
00:06:38,401 --> 00:06:39,601
I think was the word.
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00:06:39,652 --> 00:06:41,586
I didn't say...
You said "hooey"!
174
00:06:41,654 --> 00:06:42,821
All right, I've booked us
on a flight
175
00:06:42,888 --> 00:06:44,422
that leaves in two hours,
176
00:06:44,490 --> 00:06:46,958
so, um, whose credit card
shall we put it on?
177
00:06:47,026 --> 00:06:48,593
Just put it on yours
and I'll pay you back.
178
00:06:48,661 --> 00:06:50,095
Yeah, I feel like
when that happens,
179
00:06:50,162 --> 00:06:51,463
I sometimes don't
get paid back.
180
00:06:51,530 --> 00:06:52,931
Like when?
181
00:06:52,999 --> 00:06:55,267
Jersey Boys, Morton's
Steakhouse, Foxwoods...
182
00:06:55,334 --> 00:06:57,369
Foxwoods and Jersey Boys
was the same trip!
183
00:06:57,436 --> 00:06:58,870
You know what? Fine.
184
00:06:58,955 --> 00:07:00,522
I'll-I'll put it
on my card,
185
00:07:00,590 --> 00:07:02,157
but I-I-I'm just gonna say
it's a gift
186
00:07:02,224 --> 00:07:04,059
because that's the only way
I can do this anymore.
187
00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:10,997
All right, the first thing
we've got to do when we land
188
00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:12,849
is check the apartment
where Meg was abducted
189
00:07:12,916 --> 00:07:14,183
and see if we can find
some clues.
190
00:07:14,251 --> 00:07:15,918
That sounds good.
That's what I was thinking.
191
00:07:15,986 --> 00:07:18,087
Excuse me, do you mind
if we switch seats
192
00:07:18,155 --> 00:07:20,089
so my family can sit
all together?
193
00:07:20,157 --> 00:07:22,091
No, we don't...
we-we don't switch.
194
00:07:22,159 --> 00:07:23,426
'Cause when we booked,
195
00:07:23,493 --> 00:07:24,994
they didn't have
three together...
196
00:07:25,062 --> 00:07:26,662
Ma'am, ma'am,
your poor planning
197
00:07:26,730 --> 00:07:28,664
does not constitute
an emergency for me.
198
00:07:28,732 --> 00:07:31,367
You'll see him in Paris.
Go sit down.
199
00:07:31,435 --> 00:07:34,003
God, Meg's kidnappers could be
anywhere in France by now.
200
00:07:34,071 --> 00:07:35,905
Well, we do have
one lead, Brian.
201
00:07:35,973 --> 00:07:37,974
I have a recording
of the kidnapper's voice.
202
00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:39,759
What? You do? How?
203
00:07:39,810 --> 00:07:41,110
I recorded
the kidnapper's phone call
204
00:07:41,178 --> 00:07:42,311
with the fat man.
205
00:07:42,379 --> 00:07:43,679
You see, Brian,
I record
206
00:07:43,747 --> 00:07:46,048
all phone calls coming in
or out of the house.
207
00:07:46,116 --> 00:07:47,583
Y-Y-You do?
208
00:07:47,651 --> 00:07:49,952
Yep. This one's
one of my faves.
209
00:07:50,020 --> 00:07:53,155
Hello, Fundamental Industries.
How can I help you?
210
00:07:53,223 --> 00:07:54,824
Yeah, um, is this...
is this Bang Brothers?
211
00:07:54,892 --> 00:07:56,559
Yes.
212
00:07:56,627 --> 00:07:58,995
Oh. Okay. I-I-I'd like
to cancel my subscription.
213
00:07:59,062 --> 00:08:00,129
Uh, what's your name?
214
00:08:00,197 --> 00:08:01,464
Brian Griffin.
215
00:08:01,531 --> 00:08:02,865
And which site
did you belong to?
216
00:08:02,933 --> 00:08:05,368
Uh... Captain Stabbin'.
217
00:08:05,435 --> 00:08:07,003
And how are you spelling that?
218
00:08:07,070 --> 00:08:09,305
Uh... uh, "Captain", full word,
219
00:08:09,373 --> 00:08:12,408
then "Stabbin',"
S-T-A-B-B-I-N apostrophe.
220
00:08:12,476 --> 00:08:16,045
Okay, I'm checking.
221
00:08:16,113 --> 00:08:19,649
You know, in-instead
of a "G" at the end.
222
00:08:19,716 --> 00:08:21,117
I'm sorry, sir.
I'm not finding that site.
223
00:08:21,184 --> 00:08:23,052
Uh, what was the subject matter?
224
00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:25,721
Um... a guy
doing chicks on a boat
225
00:08:25,789 --> 00:08:27,456
in a, uh, captain's hat.
226
00:08:27,524 --> 00:08:29,525
Okay, I'm checking.
227
00:08:29,593 --> 00:08:31,394
The, um...
228
00:08:31,461 --> 00:08:33,129
the, passengers had, uh,
just signed up
229
00:08:33,196 --> 00:08:34,730
for a tour of the harbor
230
00:08:34,798 --> 00:08:36,799
and then
all that stuff happened.
231
00:08:36,867 --> 00:08:38,267
Okay, you made
your point.
232
00:08:46,443 --> 00:08:48,010
Well, this is where
Meg was staying.
233
00:08:48,078 --> 00:08:50,212
Oh. I thought Paris would be
a bit more picturesque.
234
00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:51,514
Instead it's just traffic
235
00:08:51,581 --> 00:08:53,983
and some big guy
using a jackhammer.
236
00:08:54,051 --> 00:08:56,218
But monsieur,
ziss is not a jackhammer.
237
00:08:56,286 --> 00:08:58,220
It is a "Jacqueshammer."
238
00:08:58,288 --> 00:09:01,557
Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-
ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-
239
00:09:01,642 --> 00:09:03,826
ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-
ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho...
240
00:09:06,263 --> 00:09:08,080
Oh, God, it's worse
than I imagined.
241
00:09:08,148 --> 00:09:09,365
You know, maybe
it'd help
242
00:09:09,433 --> 00:09:11,334
if we just tried
to track Meg's movements
243
00:09:11,401 --> 00:09:12,652
from the moment
she arrived in France.
244
00:09:12,719 --> 00:09:13,869
That's a good idea, Brian.
245
00:09:13,937 --> 00:09:15,288
Let's try Google Earth.
246
00:09:15,355 --> 00:09:16,289
Worth a shot.
247
00:09:18,692 --> 00:09:20,159
There. Enhance.
248
00:09:26,950 --> 00:09:28,784
Wow, I never knew you could
do this on a computer.
249
00:09:28,852 --> 00:09:30,820
'Course not, you spend
all your time on this
250
00:09:30,887 --> 00:09:32,388
watching Captain Stabbin'.
251
00:09:32,456 --> 00:09:34,357
All right, we've got
to find this man.
252
00:09:34,424 --> 00:09:36,625
Let's see, this was
taken at the airport.
253
00:09:36,693 --> 00:09:38,060
He could be
some sort of lookout
254
00:09:38,128 --> 00:09:39,862
who spots girls
fresh off the plane.
255
00:09:39,930 --> 00:09:42,031
Yes, you're probably right,
Brian. Such scum.
256
00:09:42,099 --> 00:09:43,733
I'll bet they target
young girls
257
00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:46,102
the way Army commercials
target minorities.
258
00:09:46,169 --> 00:09:47,320
Hey.
259
00:09:47,387 --> 00:09:48,854
Other black guys.
260
00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:50,373
It ain't so bad.
261
00:09:57,981 --> 00:09:59,899
Oh, my God, Stewie!
There he is!
262
00:09:59,950 --> 00:10:01,617
Hey, buddy, we've got
a few questions for you!
263
00:10:01,702 --> 00:10:05,488
Excuse me, but this is
a "smoking only" area.
264
00:10:05,555 --> 00:10:07,123
Oh, sorry.
Do you have a, uh...
265
00:10:09,726 --> 00:10:13,112
You know, I really only smoke
when I drink.
266
00:10:13,163 --> 00:10:15,531
Oh. Well, this is nice.
267
00:10:15,599 --> 00:10:17,666
This is a nice way
to do this.
268
00:10:17,734 --> 00:10:20,236
Look, we need to know:
have you seen this girl?
269
00:10:21,805 --> 00:10:23,439
Quick!
He's getting away!
270
00:10:26,593 --> 00:10:28,394
Oh, no, he's one of those
parkour, free-running guys.
271
00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:30,112
We'll never catch him!
272
00:10:37,037 --> 00:10:40,239
Oh, no. I have
chateau'ed myself.
273
00:10:42,175 --> 00:10:44,610
Damn it. He died before he could
tell us anything.
274
00:10:44,678 --> 00:10:45,644
Brian, he's
the first guy.
275
00:10:45,712 --> 00:10:47,313
The first guy
always dies.
276
00:10:47,381 --> 00:10:48,864
Well, I'm sure
he didn't work alone.
277
00:10:48,949 --> 00:10:50,483
Maybe there's something
in here we can use.
278
00:10:50,550 --> 00:10:52,701
Ugh, this guy has
a Velcro wallet.
279
00:10:52,769 --> 00:10:53,736
Grow up.
280
00:10:57,541 --> 00:10:59,892
All right, this is the address
that was in his wallet.
281
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:01,277
Yeah, but how are we
gonna know for sure
282
00:11:01,344 --> 00:11:02,661
if these are the guys
who took Meg?
283
00:11:02,712 --> 00:11:05,314
Well, we have the kidnapper's
voice on tape, remember?
284
00:11:05,382 --> 00:11:07,032
Drakkar Noir.
285
00:11:07,100 --> 00:11:09,068
I can use the voice
recognition software
286
00:11:09,136 --> 00:11:10,836
in this recorder
to confirm a match.
287
00:11:10,904 --> 00:11:11,821
Now, here.
288
00:11:11,888 --> 00:11:13,155
Take this briefcase.
289
00:11:14,458 --> 00:11:15,975
We're Eastern European
cologne salesmen.
290
00:11:16,042 --> 00:11:17,343
We ask them
what they want,
291
00:11:17,411 --> 00:11:18,978
and when they say
"Drakkar Noir"--
292
00:11:19,045 --> 00:11:20,079
which they all will--
293
00:11:20,147 --> 00:11:21,781
we'll know
if we have our man.
294
00:11:23,066 --> 00:11:24,300
Drakkar Noir?
295
00:11:26,636 --> 00:11:27,703
All right, well,
that's not him,
296
00:11:27,771 --> 00:11:29,238
but this is
gonna be easy.
297
00:11:32,175 --> 00:11:33,809
Well, gentlemen,
now that you have smelled
298
00:11:33,877 --> 00:11:36,045
all of our colognes,
what'll it be?
299
00:11:36,113 --> 00:11:37,680
I will take
some Drakkar Noir.
300
00:11:39,649 --> 00:11:40,583
How 'bout you?
301
00:11:40,650 --> 00:11:41,951
I am disgusting,
302
00:11:42,018 --> 00:11:44,019
so I will take
two bottle Drakkar Noir.
303
00:11:45,288 --> 00:11:46,522
How 'bout you, chief?
304
00:11:46,590 --> 00:11:47,823
Hmm.
305
00:11:47,891 --> 00:11:49,992
Let me quickly grow beard
and think about it.
306
00:11:52,596 --> 00:11:54,029
I will take
Drakkar Noir.
307
00:12:11,198 --> 00:12:12,414
What the hell
are you doing?!
308
00:12:12,499 --> 00:12:13,616
We haven't eaten
since the plane.
309
00:12:13,700 --> 00:12:14,667
I'm starving.
310
00:12:24,544 --> 00:12:25,828
Where is this girl?
311
00:12:25,896 --> 00:12:27,163
Where is she?!
312
00:12:27,230 --> 00:12:28,697
We keep girls upstairs.
313
00:12:28,765 --> 00:12:30,399
I hope you burn in hell
along with the guy
314
00:12:30,467 --> 00:12:33,302
who came up with
stuffing a turkey.
315
00:12:33,370 --> 00:12:34,904
Hey!
316
00:12:34,971 --> 00:12:37,673
Who wants to try
some of my "Butthole Bread"?
317
00:12:39,726 --> 00:12:40,759
Meg?
318
00:12:40,827 --> 00:12:41,677
Meg?
319
00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:45,564
Help... me.
320
00:12:45,632 --> 00:12:48,234
Oh, we're here to help
somebody else, sweetheart.
321
00:12:48,285 --> 00:12:49,468
Go, go, go, go. Don't...
Don't look at her.
322
00:12:49,536 --> 00:12:50,819
Don't look at her.
That was my mistake.
323
00:12:54,574 --> 00:12:56,108
Stewie, I don't see
Meg anywhere.
324
00:12:56,176 --> 00:12:57,309
Brian, look!
325
00:13:01,047 --> 00:13:02,198
Oh, my God!
326
00:13:02,265 --> 00:13:03,215
Meg!
327
00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:04,216
What the hell?
328
00:13:04,284 --> 00:13:05,351
Where'd you get that hat?
329
00:13:05,418 --> 00:13:07,019
Uh, a girl
gave it to me.
330
00:13:07,087 --> 00:13:08,237
Well, what did she
look like?
331
00:13:08,305 --> 00:13:10,306
She had a great
personality.
332
00:13:10,373 --> 00:13:11,540
That's her.
333
00:13:11,608 --> 00:13:12,975
Where is she?
Is she here?
334
00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:15,511
No, uh, they took her
just a little while ago.
335
00:13:15,579 --> 00:13:17,146
Every Wednesday night,
336
00:13:17,214 --> 00:13:18,581
they auction
some of the girls off.
337
00:13:18,648 --> 00:13:19,682
Wednesday?
338
00:13:19,749 --> 00:13:20,749
What a weird night
339
00:13:20,817 --> 00:13:22,484
to auction girls off
into slavery.
340
00:13:22,552 --> 00:13:24,019
Well, you know,
on the weekend,
341
00:13:24,087 --> 00:13:24,987
people probably
have plans.
342
00:13:25,055 --> 00:13:26,222
Have plans?
343
00:13:26,289 --> 00:13:27,456
What are you doing
that's more important
344
00:13:27,524 --> 00:13:28,791
than buying somebody?
345
00:13:28,858 --> 00:13:29,909
Look, where is
this place?
346
00:13:29,976 --> 00:13:30,943
Where do they have
the auction?
347
00:13:31,011 --> 00:13:32,044
I don't know,
348
00:13:32,112 --> 00:13:33,879
but there is
a courtesy shuttle
349
00:13:33,947 --> 00:13:35,314
that runs
every 20 minutes.
350
00:13:35,382 --> 00:13:36,482
What?
351
00:13:38,585 --> 00:13:40,085
Aw, damn it.
We just missed it.
352
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:41,520
What do you wanna do
for 20 minutes?
353
00:13:41,588 --> 00:13:42,521
Well, I don't know
'bout you,
354
00:13:42,589 --> 00:13:43,656
but I'm gonna work out.
355
00:13:43,723 --> 00:13:44,990
That's how you stay in shape.
356
00:13:45,058 --> 00:13:46,575
You just fit it in
when you have free time,
357
00:13:46,643 --> 00:13:47,843
wherever you are,
wherever you can.
358
00:13:47,928 --> 00:13:49,595
There's semen on this floor.
359
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:54,833
Stewie, look!
360
00:13:56,670 --> 00:13:57,603
We gotta get in there!
361
00:13:58,772 --> 00:14:00,155
Hey, got one more here!
362
00:14:00,223 --> 00:14:01,457
Oh, where are we?
363
00:14:01,524 --> 00:14:02,875
I'm from Atlanta.
364
00:14:02,943 --> 00:14:04,710
I don't know
where we are!
365
00:14:04,778 --> 00:14:06,845
Hey, you better hurry.
They're starting soon.
366
00:14:08,048 --> 00:14:09,114
You know what's messed up?
367
00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:10,416
This is all for charity.
368
00:14:10,483 --> 00:14:12,517
All the proceeds
are going to Oxfam.
369
00:14:21,911 --> 00:14:23,579
I hope we're not too late.
370
00:14:23,663 --> 00:14:24,997
You should not
be out here.
371
00:14:25,065 --> 00:14:26,465
Bidding is about to start.
What the hell?
372
00:14:26,533 --> 00:14:28,367
Stewie!
373
00:14:32,922 --> 00:14:36,892
The current bid is $200,000.
374
00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:38,027
Oh, my God.
375
00:14:38,094 --> 00:14:40,663
Going once, twice...
376
00:14:40,730 --> 00:14:42,798
Sold for $200,000.
377
00:14:42,866 --> 00:14:44,833
Remember:
378
00:14:44,901 --> 00:14:47,552
There is cash back
when you use your Visa Gold.
379
00:14:47,604 --> 00:14:50,189
Our next item appears to be
a late entry.
380
00:14:50,240 --> 00:14:51,724
It is not in the catalog.
381
00:14:51,791 --> 00:14:53,692
What the hell?
382
00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,427
All right, fellas,
bring the lights up a bit,
383
00:14:55,495 --> 00:14:58,030
play the CD I gave you
and let's do this!
384
00:14:58,081 --> 00:14:59,832
("California Gurls"
by Katy Perry playing)
385
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:02,167
♪ California girls,
we're unforgettable ♪
386
00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:04,620
Ah, that's right.
You like that?
387
00:15:04,704 --> 00:15:07,072
I have $50,000.
♪ Daisy Dukes, bikinis on top ♪
388
00:15:07,123 --> 00:15:09,091
I have $75,000.
♪ Sun-kissed skin so hot ♪
389
00:15:09,175 --> 00:15:10,759
Thank you, Brett Ratner.
♪ We'll melt your popsicle... ♪
390
00:15:10,844 --> 00:15:12,411
Do I have $100,000?
391
00:15:12,462 --> 00:15:14,746
Oh, for God's sake.
$500,000.
392
00:15:14,798 --> 00:15:17,216
We have $500,000.
393
00:15:17,267 --> 00:15:19,218
Going once, going twice,
394
00:15:19,269 --> 00:15:20,853
sold...
395
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:23,639
to the man
who doesn't quite get auctions.
396
00:15:23,707 --> 00:15:25,441
That was so fun.
397
00:15:25,525 --> 00:15:26,925
How do you
be paying?
398
00:15:26,993 --> 00:15:28,594
Oh, I, uh, I don't
have any money.
399
00:15:28,662 --> 00:15:29,962
Can we work it out,
400
00:15:30,030 --> 00:15:32,264
uh, maybe, some...
other way?
401
00:15:32,315 --> 00:15:33,682
Wait a minute.
402
00:15:33,750 --> 00:15:35,784
Something doesn't
smell funny here.
403
00:15:35,869 --> 00:15:37,052
You're not Arab!
404
00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:39,138
You two are coming
with me.
405
00:15:39,205 --> 00:15:40,806
This next girl is perfect
406
00:15:40,874 --> 00:15:42,875
for those of you
who want to buy a sex slave
407
00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:45,544
but don't want to spend
sex-slave money.
408
00:15:45,612 --> 00:15:46,745
Oh, my God, Meg!
409
00:15:46,813 --> 00:15:48,847
Wonder what music
they're gonna use for her?
410
00:15:48,915 --> 00:15:53,485
("Let's Make A Deal"
zonk musical cue playing)
411
00:15:55,588 --> 00:15:56,755
Huh, seems about right.
412
00:16:03,053 --> 00:16:05,304
Damn it. We were so close
to saving Meg.
413
00:16:05,388 --> 00:16:06,922
Hey, where's my sister?
414
00:16:06,973 --> 00:16:10,459
She's probably having
her shish kabobbed as we speak.
415
00:16:10,527 --> 00:16:13,062
I heard that from Samantha
in Sex and the City 2.
416
00:16:13,130 --> 00:16:14,930
Ah-ba-ba-ba-ba,
I haven't seen it yet.
417
00:16:14,998 --> 00:16:16,465
That doesn't hurt
the story.
418
00:16:16,533 --> 00:16:18,117
And now prepare to...
419
00:16:19,402 --> 00:16:21,187
We have a jail cell.
420
00:16:21,254 --> 00:16:22,471
I always tell them,
421
00:16:22,539 --> 00:16:24,473
"Put the prisoners
in the jail cell,"
422
00:16:24,541 --> 00:16:27,076
but they always say,
"Just chain 'em up to a pipe."
423
00:16:27,144 --> 00:16:28,327
Idiots.
424
00:16:29,529 --> 00:16:31,230
Hey, that was some
good teamwork, Brian.
425
00:16:31,298 --> 00:16:32,731
We were like Lewis and Clark
426
00:16:32,799 --> 00:16:34,984
and the guy who likes
to tip over canoes.
427
00:16:35,051 --> 00:16:36,952
Ugh, these rapids
are treacherous.
428
00:16:37,003 --> 00:16:38,904
We should reach calmer waters
by nightfall.
429
00:16:38,972 --> 00:16:40,489
Uh-oh!
Earthquake!
430
00:16:40,540 --> 00:16:41,507
Hey, come on!
431
00:16:41,591 --> 00:16:42,792
Careful!
432
00:16:44,845 --> 00:16:46,328
Damn it. Why is he
still with us?
433
00:16:46,379 --> 00:16:47,596
I know!
434
00:16:47,664 --> 00:16:49,098
Until now, walking
to the other end
435
00:16:49,165 --> 00:16:51,267
of the United States seemed
like such a good job.
436
00:16:54,070 --> 00:16:54,970
There she is! Hurry!
437
00:16:57,557 --> 00:16:58,724
Stewie, what are you doing?
438
00:16:58,792 --> 00:17:00,759
We'll never catch
a speeding car on foot.
439
00:17:00,827 --> 00:17:02,361
Haven't you ever seen
an action movie?
440
00:17:02,429 --> 00:17:03,863
All we have to do
441
00:17:03,930 --> 00:17:06,582
is cut diagonally
across any nearby field.
442
00:17:11,855 --> 00:17:12,705
See?
443
00:17:21,314 --> 00:17:23,599
Aw, crap, they're taking her
onto that yacht.
444
00:17:29,639 --> 00:17:31,006
All right, we just gotta
catch up to the boat.
445
00:17:31,057 --> 00:17:32,224
Well, how we
gonna do that?
446
00:17:32,292 --> 00:17:35,127
Oh, cool!
They got Car Chase GPS.
447
00:17:36,546 --> 00:17:38,981
Back up dangerously into traffic.
448
00:17:43,870 --> 00:17:48,140
Proceed wrong way
down busy street for 500 meters.
449
00:17:54,030 --> 00:17:56,665
Say "hang on"
and drive down staircase.
450
00:17:56,733 --> 00:17:58,284
Hang on!
451
00:18:06,209 --> 00:18:10,379
Poorly edited shot where driver
is obviously stuntperson.
452
00:18:21,875 --> 00:18:24,009
Leave fart in closed car
like a dick.
453
00:18:24,077 --> 00:18:25,744
Sorry about that!
454
00:18:28,315 --> 00:18:30,316
All right, they're probably
holding her below deck.
455
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:32,234
You take the right side.
I'll take the left.
456
00:18:32,285 --> 00:18:33,619
You're gonna need this.
457
00:18:33,703 --> 00:18:35,437
What? I-I-I've never
killed anybody before.
458
00:18:35,488 --> 00:18:36,655
Relax, they're Arabs.
459
00:18:36,740 --> 00:18:39,158
People will still be rooting
for you.
460
00:18:39,242 --> 00:18:40,159
Hey!
461
00:18:41,411 --> 00:18:43,796
Son of a bitch.
462
00:18:46,049 --> 00:18:48,150
Oh. This is like
a video game.
463
00:18:50,954 --> 00:18:52,721
Ah, I'm kinda good at this.
464
00:18:55,191 --> 00:18:57,142
Later, dink.
465
00:19:20,700 --> 00:19:22,401
That's for shooting
one of our guys!
466
00:19:23,620 --> 00:19:24,870
We got you!
In your face!
467
00:19:24,938 --> 00:19:26,088
Our boat!
Our boat!
468
00:19:26,156 --> 00:19:27,456
This boat!
469
00:19:30,160 --> 00:19:31,994
Let me go,
you fat bastard!
470
00:19:32,062 --> 00:19:33,963
I will never be
your sex slave!
471
00:19:34,030 --> 00:19:35,547
You misunderstand.
472
00:19:35,632 --> 00:19:37,800
I did not buy you
to be my slave.
473
00:19:37,867 --> 00:19:40,669
I bought you for my son,
and not to be his slave,
474
00:19:40,737 --> 00:19:42,905
but to be his wife.
475
00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:43,906
Wife?
476
00:19:43,974 --> 00:19:44,907
Faisal!
477
00:19:47,510 --> 00:19:48,944
This is Faisal,
478
00:19:49,012 --> 00:19:50,980
my son and the heir
to my throne.
479
00:19:52,215 --> 00:19:53,816
My father was correct.
480
00:19:53,883 --> 00:19:56,185
Your beauty
knows no bounds.
481
00:19:56,252 --> 00:19:58,287
Fair goddess,
it is my hope
482
00:19:58,355 --> 00:19:59,822
that you will agree
to be my wife,
483
00:19:59,889 --> 00:20:01,657
but the choice is yours.
484
00:20:01,725 --> 00:20:02,992
If you say "no,"
485
00:20:03,059 --> 00:20:04,560
I will have you flown back
to your family
486
00:20:04,627 --> 00:20:06,028
on our private jet.
487
00:20:06,096 --> 00:20:07,529
But if you say "yes,"
488
00:20:07,580 --> 00:20:09,498
I will spend
the rest of my days
489
00:20:09,549 --> 00:20:11,917
making your every wish
come true.
490
00:20:12,002 --> 00:20:15,254
Will you be my wife,
Princess Meg?
491
00:20:15,321 --> 00:20:17,289
Oh, yes! Yes!
492
00:20:22,112 --> 00:20:23,729
Nooooo!
493
00:20:23,813 --> 00:20:25,197
Stewie?
494
00:20:25,265 --> 00:20:28,050
Hi, Meg.
495
00:20:28,118 --> 00:20:32,118
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
496
00:20:32,513 --> 00:20:35,189
Oh honey, we are so glad
to have you back
497
00:20:35,364 --> 00:20:37,185
but you really don't
remember anything?
498
00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:38,640
Not really, Mom.
499
00:20:38,708 --> 00:20:40,575
I mean, one minute,
I was being proposed to
500
00:20:40,643 --> 00:20:42,311
by a handsome
Arabian prince,
501
00:20:42,378 --> 00:20:43,512
and the next thing
I know,
502
00:20:43,579 --> 00:20:45,414
I'm waking up
in a French hospital.
503
00:20:45,481 --> 00:20:47,149
Oh, and we heard
from Ruth's parents.
504
00:20:47,216 --> 00:20:48,884
She had her tongue ripped out.
505
00:20:49,953 --> 00:20:52,054
I guess we got off easy, huh?
506
00:20:52,121 --> 00:20:53,255
Well, we put
all your mail
507
00:20:53,323 --> 00:20:54,756
on the desk in your room,
sweetheart.
508
00:20:54,824 --> 00:20:55,958
Thanks, Dad.
509
00:20:56,025 --> 00:20:57,392
I'm kidding.
You didn't get any mail.